Conflict Resolution By DrFrankLayman Part 1 of 2

Conflict Resolution

I was recently invited by a group to speak about Conflict Resolution. I enjoyed exploring the topic and presenting what I found. It allowed me to reflect and was well received by the audience so I thought it might be helpful in this format.

Conflict resolution is a way for two or more parties to find a peaceful solution to a disagreement among them.
The disagreement may be personal, financial, political, or emotional.

When a dispute arises, often the best course of action is negotiation to resolve the dispute.

In life there are more head winds than tail winds, so being prepared for different situations, opinions, and personalities is important to mitigate disputes.

This is especially true with entry into a new culture.
Organizations not only have cultures but they contain subcultures which are influenced by the work they share.
Upon entry into a new culture, culture shock can occur. Culture shock can happen when entering into a new organization with an established culture or even moving within departments within the same organization.

Employees are people and people have a need to belong. Some cultures are so unified they exclude new entries, and some will haze new entries prior to admittance.
Some people entering a new organization and adapt they learn the rules of the culture and integrate into it, some will never belong, and others play by the rules while they work to influence changes.

Cultural shock and fitting in are referred to as organizational socialization.
Organizational socialization is a dynamic ongoing process that passes along how the organization wants its people to think, perceive, feel, and behave about their processes. This can change with changes in personnel or when roles within an organization change. A company’s culture isn’t just defined by its policies, systems, procedures and operations but how fairly and consistently it’s leadership enforces them. Then as we discussed previously
there are subcultures that have their own structure rules and followers.
In an attempt to formally socialize employees into a company culture, orientations are utilized. Informal socialization is taut on the job by peer learning is often at odds with corporate intent. When these two integration entries are not aligned discord is more probable.
Discord leads to conflict.
Conflict is an opposing action of incompatible positions: an antagonistic state or action (as of divergent ideas, interests, or persons). A disconnection of interests or desires.

Whatever the root causes of conflict we have to ask – can they be resolved and better yet can they be avoided?
Some conflicts create too great a wound to heal. Understanding this should motivate us to improve our approach for interacting and responding to others.
I believe it is far better to be a person of integrity, honesty, and transparency. I believe in virtue for virtue sake. I am also rational and will say provoking an engagement that could lead to a lifelong unresolved conflict. That kind of liability can be detrimental to anyone, no one needs that kind of threat, no matter how powerful they maybe.

There are times where conflict is forced upon a good person and in those cases we must be willing to stand up for what is right.
Great spirits have often encountered violent opposition from weak minds. Albert Einstein

Some environments are so toxic we not only need to stand up for ourselves but respect ourselves enough to exit.
Prior to getting to an escalated level of conflict what can we do to prepare for and/or avoid engaging in them?

We can develop our cognitive maturity, leadership skills, coping mechanisms, and our intellect to gain greater capability to avoid or resolve conflict.

Cognitive maturity can be taught or developed but learning doesn’t guarantee that it will be employed in the heat of the exchange.
Will the knowledge translate to the desired behavior or will a human’s default mechanism kick in. When we are attacked we have a sympathetic nervous system that prepares us for fight or flight. Our rational mind has to override these primary reflexes or defaults.
Some people know what to do in a difficult situation and can execute, others find themselves helpless to their emotional triggers.
Emotional triggers can sabotage desired responses, their programmed default trumps their training.
Some people are very manipulative and for selfish reason, pleasure, or advantage they like to manipulate others into an emotional response, to get under their skin.
I am discerning for those who are like this and don’t tolerate them on any team I build. They create discord with their manipulation and subversive bullying.
They like to be the anonymous voice that yells out to insight a crowd, the one who blows things out of proportion to get a more exaggerated response, the one who initiates the gossip.
Others aren’t always the cause sometimes the culprit is found within.
Some emotional responses are self sabotage and can be related to low self esteem or self efficacy.
Emotional responses can also be an avoidance technique as many times leadership will stop asking these people to go above and beyond. This causes an injustice which causes discord in many organizations. Personally I ascribe to rewarding the good and addressing the manipulative, they either will rise up or out. Most leaders don’t want the confrontation or work it takes to manage these kinds of people so what you see more often is the top performers being pushed more and the low performers being avoided.
This makes me wonder -Do emotional responses exist in relation to our cognitive maturity or is it an inverse relationship?
Are emotional responses a part of ETTs.

Emotional thinking traps are a term I coined from my many experiences in ownership, leadership, and military service. ETTs are patterns of thinking that are counterproductive to objective analysis and critical thinking. Objectivity is the clear lens from which truth can be seen and much can be gained. Emotional thinking is a fog that imposes reactions that are not filtered and not conducive to success. They go back to base responses and avoid higher order thinking. We are all intimately familiar with the devastating wake emotional thinking traps can leave. It is always a surprise to me how we keep falling into them. ETTs can be persistent barriers to our self improvement. Developing our mind is one of the influential keys to diminishing the toll ETTs can exact. The mind influences the enterprise of the brain which influences every thought and feeling we have. When the Mind is untrained it falls to immature patterns primal base responses.

Next time you are faced with a difficult situation or antagonistic person who attempts to create potential conflict, pause and slow things down. Step outside yourself to truly analyze what is driving and determining your verbal responses and behavior choices.

In the case of:
Minor infraction – show grace
Medium infraction – listen, discuss and work toward a mutually beneficial outcome
Multiple medium infractions – discuss, negotiate and work toward positive change
A large infraction – attempt negotiations if failed seek justice while removing yourself from the insulting environment.

Have enough respect for yourself not to allow a provoked over response or insult, and not to back down.

I am a warrior, while I believe in forgiveness for some things, I demand justice. DFL

I seek and value harmony, so sometimes I must fight for it. DFL

Thank you
DrFrankLayman
Author of: Contemplative Growth and Development; Daily Reflective Growth;
Reflections To Success; Exito A Traves Del Pensamiento Logico; Success Through Logical Thinking

The Joy OF Achievement by DrFrankLayman

I am inclined to say Success is an integral component to being satisfied in yourself and your life. If that tenant is accepted then understanding the component parts of success is important to achieving it.

Happiness lies in the joy of achievement and the thrill of creative effort. Franklin D. Roosevelt

How To Achieve
Your life is a delicate balance if it isn’t, we fall. Success has to be defined, understood, and clearly represented for us to achieve it.
By defining your success, you create a clear target to aim at. The taste of success leaves you wanting more, it gets you thinking positively and moving more fluidly, less inhibited. It has you refining your process to continue to grow and develop and ultimately achieve more.
What are the component parts of success
1) Wellness
Wellness is complex assortment of essential pillars that the rest of everything you do, are, and become rests on. We need to accept that as a paradigm shift in our thinking and use the approach I have set out in other writings and podcasts to achieve it.
2) Mental Toughness
Mental toughness is forged, built and trained, it can be improved in anyone who wants. Many people who have it too easy and don’t know the struggle of hardship don’t build it up. Push to your edge then your edge incrementally moves forward, then keep repeating the process. A better state of wellness also helps us become more mentally tough, it fortifies us steels us up from the hardships we all have to face.
3) Strong Bonds
True sincere relationships, positive social involvement with people we love and care about and who reciprocate those feelings.
4) Financial Freedom
To be financially free means that you have enough money so that you don’t worry about it continually, as most people do. Autonomy from what oppresses us, causing us to have to do something we don’t care for or for someone we don’t respect. Being forced to do something you are unhappy doing to get something that doesn’t result in happiness is not a good long term strategy. Achieving financial freedom is one of the most important goals we can make for ourselves and one of the most important goals to achieve for ourselves.
5) A Mission
If you have a why you can endure any how. Friedrich Nietzsche Having a commitment to something bigger than oneself keeps us in the game where we still have a chance at success. Durability and perseverance are enhanced when we fight for something of meaning.
6) Self-Awareness
To get results and advance you have to be at your best. You cant give your best if you are not at your best. DFL
7) Personal Growth and Development
Stagnant water grows toxic. Like water we need to flow being fluid and progressing carving out our legacy. DFL
8) Perseverance
I love the underdog story, in most of those stories you will see an underlying statement about perseverance. Learn to grow strong in adversity don’t wilt, win. DFL
9) Self efficacy
The belief in yourself comes from accomplishing and achieving. Start with the small and continue to build on your achievements challenging yourself and pushing the limits.
10) Leadership
The power and ability to lead not just others but self. This can be God Given or man made but anyone can enhance their leadership skills with training. The better the training approach and methodology the better the outcomes.
11) Courage to…
Courage is an action.
The courage to take action, The courage to stand up to fear – fear of failure or fear of success and move forward is an integral part of success.
Take Action, set up your goals looking at them through the lens of logical thought, distill them into tasks, distill the tasks to component parts, seek out information and resources that will be needed, then start. Be prepared for barriers, take time to refine and strategically prepare. Don’t lose your motivation, keep the fires burning. Commit to DSD, Don’t neglect your innovation or imagination.
Don’t set limits on the heights you can obtain. Be patient, almost all things take longer than expected and if our expectations are unreasonable or impractical we stand to lose on a winner due to frustration.

Put your heart, mind, and soul into even your smallest acts. This is the secret of success. Swami Sivananda

Success is no accident. It is hard work, perseverance, learning, studying, sacrifice and most of all, love of what you are doing or learning to do. Pele

Success is progressive development of self. DFL
DrFrankLayman
Author

Model Leadership: Mentorship As Part Of Your Leadership Paradigm by DrFrankLayman

Model Leadership: Mentorship As Part Of Your Leadership Paradigm by DrFrankLayman

Mentorship is a relationship in which a more experienced and more knowledgeable person guides a less experienced or less knowledgeable person in pursuit of growing and developing in understanding and application of skill/s.

Leadership is a skill and it transcends any environment or condition. We don’t always look at it as a formal skill to be trained but that is exactly what I am advocating and speaking to in this writing.

Healthy Leadership is needed to sustain success in any endeavor for a prolonged period of time. Those businesses with healthier more rational Leadership have a competitive advantage and greater sustainability. Sustainability will be limited if the values skills and disposition of a culture of Leadership are not passed on and that is where mentoring has a positive impact.

A true succession plan for a person or a company starts with a mission beyond self interest. DFL

Succession is dependent on the passage of leadership and the most effective vehicle is Mentorship. The calling of a True Leader is to develop those around them to create an environment fit and ready to accomplish the mission at hand while preparing for the next advancement. This paradigm should be adopted by a rational leader because it allows opportunity for growth, sustainability, and legacy.
If we concede the importance of attempting to translate leadership characteristics and actual responsibilities then we have to agree on what a leader is. A leader has to sustain morale, encourage, teach, coach, train and address deficiencies by being reliable, trustworthy, and effective. They have to grow and develop these qualities in themselves and those they are responsible for. We develop ourselves when we develop others. The virtue of mentoring goes well beyond the transposition of knowledge it truly is of translating understanding, skill, and effectiveness to another/others. Mentoring is fundamental to the passage of leadership and it is how we leave a legacy, our indelible mark. There is a great responsibility to take on the challenge of mentoring because it requires a great effort to seek to do the best possible job in developing another. There is also a responsibility for the mentored not take advantage of the kindness and assistance. There begins a paradox the old guard gives up its’ knowledge and can become vulnerable in uselessness. Some unethical systems or people take advantage of this state of transition to eliminate the old guard. This tactic may have short term effective impact but like all unethical schemes it has long term negative implications. The implication is that it creates a new negative culture, established with uncertainty, doubt and mistrust. A culture without trust is a mob soon to disburse or destruct.
Establishing a culture of leadership requires exhibiting values then teaching them and all being able to depend on them. Wisdom in leadership is balance, balance in response and individualizing response to challenge, difficulty, or hardship while maintaining steadfastness to principles and self efficacy. To the point that transparency in leadership reveals something worthy in the leader, that is illuminating and worthy of emulating. Those characteristics too subtle to observe need to be articulate and that is where mentoring has it’s most direct and profound impact on the passage of success.
A good leader tells, a great leader teaches, a true leader enables. There is a complexity of variables that allows for someone to be successful and the higher you ascend in a carrier the harder it is to solve complex problems, be innovative and advance. It really requires mentoring to ascend further than we can climb on our own. Effective mentoring is like anything else worthy of being effective, at such, teaching, coaching etc.. it takes thoughtfulness, planning and execution. Not everyone is worthy of the time or effort so be objective, don’t chose based on your like of a person. It takes discernment in where and who you invest your time.
Vet those you mentor and those you want to be mentored by, the wrong type of person will assail your kindness.
This is not an excuse not to reach out. Fear does not determine the courageous actions that beckon us. DFL

Life lived well steeped in altruism and humanity is a legacy to be gifted to those worthy of receiving it.

Reasons to Mentor
– Reaching down and help someone rise up
– Growing and developing others helps you to grow
– Enhancing challenges in your own career
– Improving your understanding of fundamentals
– Can lead to increasing your creativity
– Builds a legacy

Reasons to seek and gain a Mentor
– Challenges you
– Allows you to grow faster
– Allows you to move further
– Develop further the infrastructure of growth and culture of leadership
– Realization of Broader more diverse applications and effectiveness
– Allows you to advance in contributions
– Helps to improve performance and effectiveness

Your Leadership paradigm needs to be a part of your true inner self displayed in a way that can be received without interpretation. DFL
Being transparent, true, competent, and reliable are the best ways to imprint yourself on your culture and be a sustaining influencer.

For all there is virtue in doing virtues acts.
Seeking to better yourself will allow you to do so
Seeking to better someone else will allow you to better yourself

I recently did a lecture entitled: A LEADER OF ONE for the LIFT program I volunteer with in my community and I can tell you first hand, it is very satisfying to assume the responsibility and be the conduit for the passage of insight, wisdom, or skill.
Mentorship is a great opportunity to advance others and yourself.

“A Candle Loses Nothing by Lighting Another Candle.” Italian Proverb

Thank you
DrFrankLayman
Author of: Contemplative Growth and Development; Daily Reflective Growth;
Reflections To Success; Success Through Logical Thinking

Fundamentals of Professionalism: How Being More Professional Can Enhance Your Carrier and Your Happiness. By DrFrankLayman

Fundamentals of Professionalism: How Being More Professional Can Enhance Your Carrier and Your Happiness. By DrFrankLayman

Professionalism is defined as the skill, good judgment, and polite behavior that is expected from a person who is trained to do a job well. You don’t have to be a doctor, lawyer or other professional to act with professionalism. I would advocate that assuming the disposition of a true professional, engaging in your work with professionalism, will enhance your career and your happiness in that chosen vocation. Whatever your position, even if it is transient (that you don’t plan to hold it for long in the pursuit of something more), or if it is an entry level you are occupying by assuming your position with the posture of professionalism you will be more effective, happier, and better set for growth and development.
For many waiting tables is a transient occupation, yet there are some who have elevated it to a profession they are trained, skilled, and not easily replaced. Just look on LinkedIn you will see titles like Professional Wait Staff / Assistant Sommelier. Check out any 5 star rated restaurant and you will notice that the atmosphere is different, not just due to what is being served or the physical structure it is held in but it has someone within it who understands why professionalism is essential to enhancing the experience of those being served even in what many consider to be a menial position.

So never lose an opportunity of urging a practical beginning, however small, for it is wonderful how often in such matters the mustard-seed germinates and roots itself. Florence Nightingale

Being more professional, aiming to think believe and behave in a positive and effective manner – The conduct, intentions, qualities that characterize a professional are performance enhancers. Display these qualities in any position and you will be more effective and that improves your chances of greater/more opportunities. That as an objective target of self is only going to increase your effectiveness no matter what you are doing now or training to be.
I started thinking, acting, behaving, and learning my profession long before I entered it because professional domineer extends beyond on vocation to any chosen career avenue I decide to participate in. Part of professionalism is training in skills that distinguish you from others doing the same work. That requires the leadership of self to work and strive for more. The best leadership development begins with comprehensive self development.DFL
Being professional doesn’t imply being formal. Some will use formal behavior as a barrier to exclude themselves from others, to lord over and distinguish themselves as superior. This is not what it means to be a professional or the intent of professionalism. A professional is skilled and those truly skilled are effective. Seek results not façade or flare. Don’t exclude others include them, that allows you to cast a larger net to help more people as true professionalism requires a selfless mission aimed at contributing, helping, and being a blessing to others.
A great person like a great river will not refuse the smallest contributories. DFL
If you judge yourself above others what kind of perspective will you have for those you want to help?
Selfless missions contribute to happiness. Don’t underestimate the value of a life dedicated to a virtuous/selfless mission. DFL
Be the professional you want to become and you will be all the more closer to obtaining it and all that comes with it.DFL
Understanding skill and knowledge are transferable attributes that will follow you as you grow and develop in your career and as a person. DFL
From the lowest of positions to the highest station we should adhere to being true leaders and professionals. Not choosing what is easiest but challenging ourselves with that worth doing, thinking, being, and acting in and always for it is for the good as true professionalism demands.

Thank you
DrFrankLayman
Author of Success Through Logical Thinking
Reflections To Success
Daily Reflective Growth
Contemplative Growth and Development

Thank The Passer: Not Just A Gesture For Basketball But One For Business By DrFrankLayman

Thank The Passer: Not Just A Gesture For Basketball But One For Business
DrFrankLayman

Thank the passer by taking an eighth of a second to point-to-the-passer and acknowledge their selflessness. This quick and simple gesture is an action that promotes team unity.

The Origins of the acknowledgement

In the 60’s and 70’s a conversation between Dean Smith and John Wooden initiated a basketball tradition of generosity and unselfishness. The goal was simple to initiate an overt gesture to build team unity by acknowledgement. Coach Dean Smith asked players on the UNC men’s basketball teams to recognize the unselfish act of a teammate’s pass to them.

It became a team rule. In practices, games, and other Tar Heel basketball activities, the man who scored had to point-to-the-passer.

Dean Smith was a great leader who mentored others to be great leaders and this acknowledgement he built into a habitual exhibit of appreciation demonstrates his brilliance as a mentor, coach, and leader. Not acknowledging others that have helped us and participated in our success is greedy, selfish, entitled, and demonstrates the weakness of self doubt.

True leaders want to recognize everyone who contribute and do it in a fair and consistent way.DFL

This gesture in basketball is linear it acknowledges the last pass that lead to scoring while in business it isn’t as easy and we have to be mindful confident and fair enough to take the time to acknowledge other contributors.

The absence of acknowledgement is neglect and to neglect someone is a slight – it is disrespectful and leads away from a good relationship, not toward it.

I want those in my charge to feel fairly rewarded with acknowledgement and I want each one of them to be aggressively recognizing those who made a considerable contribution above, below, and across their station.

This is all based on honesty, fairness, and mindfulness realizing that acknowledgements, compliments, and recognition are earned they are not just given away. If they aren’t earned or truly challenging enough to warrant they will have no meaning or impact to motivate future great work, thought, or action.

I do believe in praising that which deserves to be praised. Dean Smith

If I have seen further than others, it is by standing upon the shoulders of giants. Isaac Newton

Take your yourself and those in your sphere of influence further by being generous and positive and freely communicating it and showing it. Take the risk and be brave enough to so you care.

I worry that business leaders are more interested in material gain than they are in having the patience to build up a strong organization, and a strong organization starts with caring for their people. John Wooden

Thank you

DrFrankLayman

The Pillars of Daily Self Development By DrFrankLayman

The Pillars of Daily Self Development by DrFrankLayman

My approach to daily self development, isn’t a forced or a habitual routine (monotony diminishes innovation and happiness), it is a paradigm shift. You will want to work on these encourage and motivate yourself everyday and forgive yourself if you can’t get to all of them. You will slowly find more time and become more efficient in your approach. Work on yourself everyday and as you grow and develop your self confidence and self efficacy will benefit as will your durability and effectiveness. Achievement in the small leads to achievement in the grand. Between the intervals of the must do’s of life therein lies the opportunity to achieve and advance.

You can remain idle hoping or you can be active achieving. DFL

There is something about achievement success and action that are intimately tied.

The cornerstones on which we will set our foundation are:

Sincerity, truth and ethics

Love and kindness

Wisdom, understanding and peace

Durability and legacy

From a strong foundation we will build strong pillars that will support a taller structure placing one story atop another we will rise elevating ourselves to new heights.

There is something about achievement success and action that are intimately tied.
Intellect- pursuing things of more complex forms and fields of knowledge. Engage your mind, not being passive and accepting of the information streaming at you. You need to plan and pursue those things that are meaningful and will get you where you want to be in your life and that takes seeking, studying and referencing for understanding and assimilation.

Emotional – a state of consciousness based on feelings of joy, sorrow, fear, hate, or the like that circumvents rational thinking. Think of those difficult people you have encountered, the ones who have difficulty adjusting, who act out and how it influences their relationships. There are ways to improve your emotional intelligence and I urge you to seek them out. It is a topic I have written about and been invited to speak about to some significant companies. Its impact is well documented and it is relevant to individuals, teams and companies.

Spiritual – of or relating to the spirit as the seat of the moral or religious nature. I am a Christian but I am not just speaking to Christian spirituality here. It is the peace found in faith and belief of that which is ethereal. Think about the person who overcomes hardship and with grace and confidence meets adversity knowing they will overcome and therefore they have peace during all of life’s upheavals.

Social – seeking or enjoying the companionship of others; friendly; sociable; gregarious and one who is sought by others for those characteristics. Watch and observe actively seek ways to improve your ability to engage people in a meaningful way and sustain their relationships.

Leadership – the ability to guiding directing developing and influencing others. If everything is sales everything else is leadership when considering the vestige of success.

Entrepreneurship – being industrious enough to organize and manage any enterprise with skill usually with considerable initiative and risk. If you build a life take the initiative to build your own not someone else’s.

Expertise – the matter that is subject to some action and is performed with above average skill. Whatever your vocation or that which you want to be your vocation must be overcome by judicious study and deliberate exposure to gain insight and experience. Work to be the best at your craft by mindful study and acquisition of experience.

Health and Wellness – the progressive and unceasing pursuit of an improved state of internal being. This is comprehensive to physical and mental health. Fitness due to is powerful influence over health and wellness is a strong subset of this category. Nutrition and proper supplementation cannot be separated due to the strong physiological influences it has. It is not only about what we do to improve in this area but what we constrain ourselves from doing. Physical fitness

Mission/Purpose – an important task duty goal or calling that is interlaced with a strong conviction. Purpose the reason for which we exist. Given a reason I can sustain the journey no matter its length or difficulty to ensure I arrive at my desired destination.

Financial is not listed, however, improving yourself in the above areas, should translate to a healthier and more prudent relationship with money. We will leave this topic for another discussion as it is complex and requires more time to explore.

Remember the refuge of a sound mind can protect us from any foe, wrong, insult, or trauma. Given the recognition of these areas of development we now need to have an action plan to grow and develop in them. Growth and development should yield improvement that gains us more of what we seek in life.

Working on these daily will create a compounding effect that allows the you of tomorrow a better probability of success. They are also coping mechanism and can help you whether the storms of tomorrow.

Peace is reached by being active in what brings you joy and purpose and that develops your intellect, health and mission.DFL

The ultimate human endeavors is to find and retain happiness. Working on yourself so you can selflessly serve others brings great happiness. Happiness achieved can be gifted to others.

To have Happiness you must define it, seek it, express it, and share it. DFL

Thank you
DrFrankLayman
Author of: Contemplative Growth and Development; Daily Reflective Growth;
Reflections To Success; Success Through Logical Thinking

Transition Embraced: Searching For Opportunitiy In Challenge by DrFrankLayman

Transition Embraced: Searching For Opportunitiy In Challenge by DrFrankLayman

Transition feared is abysmal
Transition anticipated is infinite
DFL

Given the proper mentor and perspective transition is an opportunity for growth, achievement and success DFL

I chose to define Transition in terms of development evolution passage progress
Metamorphosis transformation.

Many fear it because transition Is difficult – growth always is.

Recently I Lectured on Positive Transition To Military personnel transitioning to the Civilian Workforce
I challenged them to think differently about the U know they face ahead of them
To see transition as a challenge and acknowledge that Challenges to allow for growth and opportunity
To go out with enthusiasm a plan and an adaptable mindset.
Not to just accept the conventional transition of getting a job but to consider transforming into and entrepreneur.
Not to accept the conventional definition of an entrepreneur but to consider my definition

Entrepreneur
One who finds a way to get compensated for their passion and happiness.

Then consider a team behind their endeavor, one that has the experience and tools to increase the probability of success.

I hated every minute of training, but I said, ‘Don’t quit. Suffer now and live the rest of your life as a champion.’ Muhammad Ali

We have to be realistic and understand transition takes time but I have the benefit of having gone through some tuff transitions and I have discovered

Small steps in my journeys have lead me to extraordinary places. DFL

Remember you have to include yourself, don’t wilt or retreat during this process

If you see the world as them and me you’ll always be excluded if you see it as us you’ll always be included DFl

That said we must dream and work.

Your not who you were which allows you to be something more DFL

My humanity is incessant self overcoming. Friedrich Nietzsche

No matter the transition you face now or in your future prepare yourself daily because they are coming and they don’t stop it’s like standing at the shore and meeting the waves you have to be ready to face the relentless surf with mindful intent and you will either struggle against it or learn to play in it – that is a choice

Don’t let your ego isolate you from the people and organizations that can help you. Out of pride we sometimes make the wrong decision not to seek help.
I want you to be self reliant but also capable of networking and reaching out to others. It is a complex tight rope to walk but becoming skill can make the difference of falling or moving forward.

Finally don’t let anyone pigeon hole you look at the opportunities and be confident your skills can be transposed.
Don’t let the critics dictate your dreams.
Many dreams are symbolic and at the same time real because reality is shaped by belief and perception DFL

Thank you
DrFrankLayman
Author of: Contemplative Growth and Development; Daily Reflective Growth;
Reflections To Success; Success Through Logical Thinking

Leadership Styles: Individualize Your Approach To Maximize Effectiveness By DrFrankLayman

Leadership Styles: Individualize Your Approach To Maximize Effectiveness By DrFrankLayman

 

While speaking at Hire Heroes the topic focused on leadership and professionalism in one of the following tracks – career, business leadership, entrepreneur. During my lecture, given the constraints of time, I could only discuss a few of the many leadership styles. One of the participants asked for an expounding of the topic and that was the motivation for this blog.

Leadership style refers to characteristics and behaviors exhibited when leading a team. Leadership style can influence performance and we should all strive to be the best leader we can so we can be as effective as we can. Great leaders can create great change, motivate performance, enhance creativity and innovation in others.

Early leadership style research

Leadership styles were first more formally defined in the late 1930s by a group of psychologists, the leader was Kurt Lewin.

If you want to truly understand something, try to change it. Kurt Lewin

His team studied youth leaders in activity groups and examined behaviors and discerned three leadership styles.

The autocratic style is one in which a single person takes control and makes decisions, directing others in his or her chosen course of action. Lewin’s team found that this was the most unsatisfactory leadership style with the youth groups.
In a democratic leadership style, one person takes control but is open to group input, often allowing the group to make decisions and collectively assign tasks. This leader guides rather than directs. This was the most popular leadership style in the youth groups and garnered the greatest positive response.
With the laissez-faire approach, the person in charge stepped back and did nothing. He or she provided no direction or guidance. The group was disorganized and unproductive.
Their research supports the idea that people aren’t just born leaders but can be trained to be leaders. They also recognized the influence that the team members had on a person’s leadership style. This is important and explains why some people are effective in some situations and not others as leaders.

In the 1970s, Paul Hersey and Ken Blanchard introduced the concept of situational leadership meaning that a leader adapts his or her style to the situation. Situational leadership refers to when the leader of an organization adjusts his style to fit the developmental level of the team he is attempting to influence.

Leadership approaches can be influenced by the strength and personalities of the team. A strong team may require little or no guidance, yet another team may require more guidance and support.

Overtime other styles have been identified and written about.

Bureaucratic leadership, whose leaders focus on following every rule. The extreme of this is an agent see Milgram’s work on obedience
Charismatic leadership, in which leaders inspire enthusiasm in their teams and are energetic in motivating others to move forward. The extreme the only advance their selfish interests
Task-oriented leadership, whose leaders focus only on getting the job done. Results based leadership is good and can be folded into other styles
People-driven leadership, in which leaders are tuned into organizing, supporting and developing people on their teams.
Transformational leadership, whose leaders inspire by expecting the best from everyone and themselves.
Servant leadership was developed by Robert K. Greenleaf in 1970. The servant leader serves the people he/she leads, which implies that employees are an end in themselves rather than a means to an organizational purpose or bottom line.

Modern leadership characteristics:

Cognitive maturity
Empathy
Trustworthy
Decisive
Sincere
Aware
Focus
Accountability
Confidence
Optimismtic
Honest
Inspiraing
Motivating
Skilled
Professional
Ethical

Modern Leadership Perspectives
Daniel Goleman discusses six leadership styles, which he argues spring from different components of emotional intelligence:

Commanding: Leaders demand compliance.
Visionary: Leaders mobilize people toward a vision.
Affiliative: Leaders create emotional bonds to their team.
Democratic: Leaders build consensus through participation and interaction.
Pacesetting: Leaders expect excellence and self-direction from team members.
Coaching: Leaders develop people for the future and team member’s future.
The Transformational Leadership Style
Transformational leadership is often identified as the single most effective style. This style was first described during the late 1970s and later expanded upon by researcher Bernard M. Bass. Some of the key characteristics of his style of leadership are the abilities to motivate and inspire followers and to direct positive changes in groups.

Transformational leaders tend to be emotionally intelligent, energetic, and passionate. They are not only committed to helping the organization achieve its goals, but also to helping group members fulfill their potential.

There exists evidence of its effectiveness in promoting well being in the team and a higher performance and improved group satisfaction than other leadership styles tested.

The Transactional Leadership Style
Transactional leadership views the leader-follower relationship as a transaction. By accepting a position as a member of the group, the individual has agreed to obey the leader. In most situations, this involves the employer-employee relationship, and the transaction focuses on the follower completing required tasks in exchanged for monetary compensation.
One of the main advantages of this leadership style is that it creates clearly defined roles. People know what they are required to do and what they will be receiving in exchange for completing these tasks. It also allows leaders to offer a great deal of supervision and direction if it is needed. Team members may also be motivated to perform well to receive rewards. One of the biggest downsides is that the transactional style tends to stifle creativity and limits opportunity for a true win-win situation to develop.

The Situational Leadership Styles
The Situational Leadership style the leaders stress the significant influence of the environment and the situation on leadership.

The situational theory of leadership suggests that no single leadership style is most effective. Instead, it depends on the situation at hand and which type of leadership and strategies are best-suited to the task. According to the theory, the most effective leaders are those that are able to adapt their style to the situation and look at cues such as the type of task, the nature of the group, and other factors that might contribute to getting the job done.

They also

Maintain an acute awareness of their innate leadership-related strengths and areas for development – critical skill sets in working in high-performing organizations
Conduct highly effective coaching conversations by understanding when a particular leadership style has a high probability of success and when it does not
Skillfully influence up, down and across the organization by knowing when to be “consistent” and when to be “flexible”
Create more productive teams/organizations by accelerating the development of individuals that are new to their role and/or are learning a new task
Develop engaged, committed employees by effectively recognizing and proactively addressing the dynamics of performance regression
Effectively drive behavior change and business results by communicating through a common, practical language of leadership
Situational leadership theory is often referred to as the Hersey-Blanchard Situational Leadership Theory.
Hershey and Blanchard’s Leadership Styles

Hershey and Blanchard suggested that there are four primary leadership styles:

Telling (S1): This style involves the leader telling people what to do and how to do it.
Selling (S2): This style involves more back-and-forth between leaders and followers. Leaders “sell” their ideas and message to get group members to buy into the process.
Participating (S3): In this approach, the leaders offers less direction and allows members of the group to take a more active role in coming up with ideas and making decisions.
Delegating (S4): This style is characterized by a less involved, hands-off approach to leadership. Group members tend to make most of the decisions and take most of the responsibility for what happens.
Leadership and Maturity Levels
So how exactly do leaders and managers determine which style of leadership to use? The right style depends a lot on the maturity level (i.e. the level of knowledge and competence) of the individuals or group.

Hershey and Blanchard’s theory identifies four different levels of maturity

M1: Group members lack the knowledge, skills, and willingness to complete the task.
M2: Group members are willing and enthusiastic, but lack the ability.
M3: Group members have the skills and capability to complete the task, but are unwilling to take responsibility.
M4: Group members are highly skilled and willing to complete the task.
The Hershey-Blanchard model suggests that the following leadership styles are the most appropriate for these maturity levels:

Low Maturity (M1) – Telling (S1)
Medium Maturity (M2) – Selling (S2)
Medium Maturity (M3) – Participating (S3)
High Maturity (M4) – Delegating (S4)
The SLII Model
The Situational Leadership II (or SLII model) was developed by Kenneth Blanchard and builds on Blanchard and Hershey’s original theory. According to the revised version of the theory, effective leaders must base their behavior on the developmental level of group members for specific tasks. The developmental level is determined by each individual’s level of competence and commitment.

Enthusiastic Beginner (D1): High commitment, low competence.
Disillusioned Learner (D2): Some competence, but setbacks have led to low commitment.
Capable but Cautious Performer (D3):Competence is growing, but level of commitment varies.
Self-Reliant Achiever (D4): High competence and commitment.
SLII also suggests that effective leadership is dependent upon two key behaviors: supporting and directing. Directing behaviors include giving specific directions and instructions and attempting to control the behavior of group members. Supporting behaviors include actions such as encouraging subordinates, listening, and offering recognition and feedback.

The theory identifies four basic leadership styles.

Directing (S1): High on directing behaviors, low on supporting behaviors.
Coaching (S2): High on both directing and supporting behaviors.
Supporting (S3): Low on directing behavior and high on supporting behaviors.
Delegating (S4): Low on both directing and supporting behaviors.
The main point of SLII theory is that not one of these four leadership styles is best. Instead, an effective leader will match his or her behavior to the developmental skill of each team member for the task at hand.

Purpose Driven Leader

“The purpose of life is to contribute in some way to making things better.” – Robert F. Kennedy
Purpose-driven serve the purpose (the “something bigger”) the reason the organization exist. d
Decisions are made and actions are taken based on the purpose.. In other words, effective leaders align themselves with the purpose by doing this leaders run the avoid the risk of falling victim to pursuit of selfish interests and greed.

Man’s Search For Meaning Victor Frankl
Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of human freedoms – to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way. Viktor E. Frankl
He who has a why to live can bear almost any how. Friedrich Nietzsche

Meaning takes place in progressively larger goals rooted in deeply held beliefs.
I believe the most important attribute for a leader is being principle-centered. Centering on principles that are universal and timeless provides a foundation and compass to guide every decision and every act. I’ve based my life’s work on promoting principles and teaching the power that resides in principle-centered leadership. Principles are not my invention; they are self-evident and are found throughout the world. If you look at all enduring philosophies, religions and thoughts, you will find principles such as integrity, compassion, trust, honesty, accountability and others at their core. I simply translated these principles into a framework of habits, which when followed with consistency and frequency transforms one’s character and allows one to earn the moral authority necessary for enduring leaderStephen Cove

Leader’s should pause to keep Integrity, Humility, and Generosity ever present in their encounters, approaches, and decisions.

Trust Based Leadership Style
This is a style I am advocating. It comes from the work of my friend Dr. Aneil Mishra and his wife Dr. Karen Mishra from their work Trust Is Everything and Becoming A Trustworthy Leader.

Trust based leaders are the ROCC to creating a trust based culture

Reliable

Open

Competent

Compassionate

Leaders create organizational climates in which people trust leaders, leaders trust their people, people trust each other and people trust themselves to use their judgement, make choices and act within the corporate intent. Trust advances productivity, innovation, and engagement in the team as it advances satisfaction and results.

What’s Your Learning Style?
As you can see, there are different ways to conceive of leadership styles. The leader’s personality and the teams’ personality also contribute to effectiveness and performance.

http://www.tuw.edu/business/leadership-style-quiz/

http://www.keirsey.com/default.aspx

http://www.seemypersonality.com/#q1

 

There are many leadership styles to utilizes. Personally my advice is to learn them and then learn your team. Know their heart and goals so that you can individualize your approach and maximize your effectiveness as a leader.

Your Leadership paradigm needs to be a part of your true inner self displayed in a way that it can be received without translation. DFL

The purer your Leadership is of sincerity, transparency, and truth the purer it will be received and responded to. DFL

 

Please also see my Blog Legacy of Leadership and considering investing in my Book

Success Through Logical Thinking

 

Thank you
DrFrankLayman
Author of: Contemplative Growth and Development; Daily Reflective Growth;
Reflections To Success; Success Through Logical Thinking

#STLTmindset

 

The Legacy of Achievement: Stall Descent and Ascend. By Dr.FrankLayman

The Legacy of Achievement: Stall Descent and Ascend. By Dr.FrankLayman

Decay is inherent in all compounded things. Strive on with diligence. Buddha

Decay is a naturally occurring process and requires action to stall, diminish, or resolve. In our life time we will have an accelerated growth and development until one day we don’t. What causes that decline is interesting to me. Why does that decline occur to so many yet there are those who are always growing and developing, they stall the decent extending the journey and their positive influence along with it. Harland Sanders, Ray Kroc, Henry Ford (all late bloomers to success) understood that diligence makes for opportunity. We are not to just sit by idly and watch the world go by along with our life. We need to engage in the world in a dedicated, deliberate, and durable manner. The intent should be to grow and develop into what we want not be complacent or self destructive. There are no overnight successes and we are all fighting the process of decay. Some will chose a better path to this naturally occurring processes, I strongly advocate daily self development as a way to cope with the difficulties of life and also to gain a compounding effect. Small changes overtime can lead to great achievements and advancements.

I had three friends in high school. One had it all with an early start from his parents he was athletic, wealthy, and intelligent. The other friend was always just there he engaged in a way that took little thought and energy. Then there was the one he was poor but always worked hard. He dedicated himself everyday. Nothing came easy everything was a struggle for him. They all made it through high school. The BMOC went to a large school and became average, the complacent guy went to a school close enough to live home. The hard working guy worked hard every day went on to college and excelled. They all did well for themselves one exceeded the others and has the likelihood of the best future. Can you anticipate who that is? Now tell me why.

Large things come from small deliberate steps made consistently over a life time. Change occurs but is not instant, it takes time. To build on a large scale we have to chip away at it or deliberately go about adding to it, compounding our impact over a lifetime. It is not always condition but approach that makes people successful.DFL Neglect decays things slowly over time so the antidote as it requires engagement, action is needed to stop the advance of decline and mindfulness and approach to grow from it. The star athlete who is now overweight and in a dead end career and the gymnast who is unhappy at her work and in her relationship they decayed and are on a decline. The high school student voted most likely to succeed who is living a common existence. This isn’t out of the ordinary, it is in fact typical. Many things will come into play as to whether we sustain growth or diminish and decline over time. Where we start out isn’t an indicator of success, It is more about our approach and mindset to growth. Are we going to challenge ourselves everyday to grow and develop. Are we going to advance in our preparation or just exist. Are we going to take deliberate steps to be create a better future version of ourselves.

Unmanaged resources become liabilities. DFL

Starting on this path isn’t always pretty, as anyone who has decided to change experiences everyone wants it to be immediate and comes out of the gate set on fire. Anyone who has ever gotten their car stuck in mudd can attest slamming on an accelerator in mud is messy and can get you stuck deeper. The best strategy is slow steady application of the accelerator without wavering. Small changes daily over an long period of time create sustained growth and true development. The point then is that it is in mindfulness and deliberate daily development that can allow the advance against the odds or against inhospitable circumstance and sustain it.

He who labors diligently need never despair; for all things are accomplished by diligence and labor. Menander of Athens

Because of mindfulness and durability given enough time I will prevail. Not because I’m the best or the smartest and definitely not because of circumstance. I’ll advance because of the positive mindset and dedication to daily development I’ve followed. I will continue this coarse and gain in my advances and with the longevity that comes from it I will enhance my legacy. I’ve helped a lot of people realize their potential in this way, advocating daily development and because it’s overlap with coping skills it makes for a sustainable and successful approach. Coping skills are needed for us to navigate the challenge which life is at times. I don’t believe in strict regimens as they are not sustainable over time. I also think them mundane and boring which depletes creativity. I believe where ever you are now with the right approach you can slowly take yourself to where you want to be. First you need a hard target, then mental toughness, self efficacy, an approach and a plan. Then a check list of action to take, then relentless advancement especially in the face of barriers which requires adaptability. Then once you have arrived the willingness to take aim and advance further building to a new goal. The trickiest part is to view it all with gratitude and happiness.

Ultimately I like for those I advise to be well rounded (see my pillars of self development Blog) devoted to daily self development then to advance in a mission and work to improve leadership skills and become a business leader advancing still to find ways to become an entrepreneur. Life is too short to sit idly by.

You can be idle hoping or active achieving. DFL

There is not only a sense of value of self in achievement, there is happiness in being creative, problem solving, working and reaching a goal especially when that goal aligns with your personal mission.

Recently, I spoke at Hire Heroes and discussed the importance of daily self development as an approach to advancing professionalism in a career path, as a business leader, and/or as an entrepreneur. Performance is critical in these areas and professionalism is required and as discussed durability, and sustainability of effectiveness is necessary to continue to grow or at the least prevent descent.

Don’t limit yourself and don’t let anyone pigeon hole you, become who you are meant to be. Entrepreneurs come in all shapes and sizes they are not bound to being one thing. Don’t judge others ability to become an entrepreneur or your own.

We are only limited by our gender, physicality, SES, or past if we accept them as barriers. DFL

What entrepreneurs have in common is mindfulness, drive, durability and an effective approach. Longevity achieved by daily development generates the momentum of a compounding effect if we don’t wilt once it is discovered that success is a mountain climb, not a sprint. DFL

For more on the legacy of achievement please see my other writings and my book

Success Through Logical Thinking

 

Dr.FrankLayman

 

The Legacy of Selflessness: My Time with The Staff of Hire Heroes. By Dr.FrankLayman

The Legacy of Selflessness: My Time with The Staff of Hire Heroes.                         By Dr.FrankLayman

I was fortunate enough to be asked to speak at Hire Heroes recently and was grateful for the experience. Many times in life you engage others to impress upon them insight or educate them and the nature of my lecture was on options and directions for transitioning Veterans. I spoke about areas I have been successful in and the pros and cons to pursuing them. I also attempted to show how Entrepreneurship, Business Leadership and Career Paths overlap. Delivering the lecture I was professional but, within me, I was so honored to be in the presence of this group. They are the staff that works hard to ease the transition of our Veterans, to find a new place outside the military for them to belong and contribute.

No legacy is greater than one whose life is devoted to the development                of others. DFL

Some people are fans of athletes, actors, or politicians, I am a fan of those whose work and whose legacy is geared to helping others and contributing to the great good. This group was intellectually strong and challenged me in some very profound ways. It was such an inspiring experience for me, I was attempting to give them a gift and it was a gift they provided me. These dedicated professionals are resourceful, skilled, and brilliant – No surprise. What was surprising is their welcoming manner and willingness to engage intellectually. We discussed options for growth and development and how they can impact Leadership in general and specific to Entrepreunership, Business Leadership and/or a Career Path to those they help.
Our Veterans have held the greatest of responsibilities faced the most challenging situations and have been developed in a growth incubator, yet their skills are not always accounted for in corporate American and many feel disenfranchised as they seek leadership roles comparable to what they left in their time of service. They are often disappointed by the abrupt demotion once they leave their military careers for civilian ones. I want to help them be successful in any area they chose but to be realistic about the prospects they face. Many of them will find frustration and should they not be satisfied with what is available my hope is they will consider reaching out to the professionals at Hire Heroes. That they will pursue daily self development as a means to grow and develop themselves but also to cope with the challenges of transition. I want them to have the self efficacy and competence to consider carving out their own path. Taking their unique qualities, experiences, mindset, and work ethic to be successful in the arena of Leadership.

I believe in the growth and development of humanity through the growth and development of the individual. DFL

Our Veterans need men and women skilled enough to help them navigate the challenges and options that await them. The frustrations that can be confronted are far easier to bare together than alone. I would encourage others to support this organization with their time and donations.

The discourse from my time with the group at Hire Heroes was so introspective it caused so much thought activity and creativity I am compelled to follow it up with some supporting Blogs. I hope my future writings will fill the gap of what we covered and the other ideas, thoughts, perspectives and insights they sparked within me.

Their mission is a great one, we can not forget those who sacrificed so much for all of us, we can not forget our Veterans. I would encourage all of you to get involved, reach out, and help those who are contributing so much to this worthy cause.

Thank you again to Hire Heroes for having me and please look out for my upcoming Blogs inspired by our thought provoking time together.

Dr.FrankLayman
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