Attributes of Noble Character by DrFrankLayman

Attributes of Noble Character by DrFrankLayman

Clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Colossians

Good character consists of defined and imparted values that are mindfully adopted despite hardship, betrayal, or loss. They come from self-reflection and having the courage to live your life according to a set of principles to achieve a positive purpose.

So how do you begin to improve your character? Every great act is preceded by a positive thought and strong motivation. DFL
To change or to advance we need to want to, we need to objectively see in ourselves the need to advance. Let’s break the complexity of Character into component parts and work on those with a mindful intent to grow, develop, and improve.

The things that matter deserve defining and focusing on with the intent of improving. The power we have over our thoughts strongly relates to the power we exert over our lives. DFL
Let’s look at 21 good character traits that impact you and those in your realm of influence…

1. Integrity
Integrity is having strong moral principles and conducting your life by them as a guide. When you have integrity, you are focused on the truth and your thoughts actions and reactions follow it.

2. Honesty
Being straightforward, transparent, and trustworthy in all of your thoughts, interactions, and relationships. Being honest requires you be true to your authentic self.

3. Loyalty
Loyalty is faithfulness and devotion to your loved ones, your friends, and anyone with whom you have a trusted relationship.
Nothing is more noble, nothing more venerable than fidelity. Faithfulness and truth are the most sacred excellences and endowments of the human mind. Marcus Tullius Cicero

4. Respectfulness
Courtesy, kindness, deference, dignity, and civility. You offer basic respect as a sign of your value for the worth of all people and your ability to accept the inherent flaws we all possess.

5. Responsible
Be accountable for someone or something. Following through on commitments made.

6. Cognitive Maturity
Thoughtfulness of others and yourself. The ability to be empathetic and discern to have the wisdom needed to approach difficult circumstances working toward a positive and meaningful outcome for all.

7. Benevolence
Well meaning and kindly. Wanting and willing to act on the behalf to help aide or improve others’ lives.

8. Fairness
Using wisdom, empathy, and integrity to make decisions and take actions that result in the best possible outcome for all.

9. Authenticity
You are able to be your true self, without façade, pretense , or insincerity. It is the power to be vulnerable in the presence of others especially critics. It is also powerful not to be counterfeit to who you are.

10. Courageousness
Mental strength and fortitude to carry on with in the face of hardship.

11. Resilience
True grit. The capacity to recover quickly from difficulties, toughness or hardship. The ability to spring back.

12. Respectfulness
Being not only polite to yourself and others but being truly invested in addressing yourself and others with deference.

13. Lovingness
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. Paul

14. Optimistic
Positive in thought and action.

15. Reliable
You can be consistently depended upon to follow through on your commitments, actions, and decisions. You do what you say you will do.

16. Conscientious
Earnestly providing the best effort under the time, resources, and conditions.

17. Selfless
Not to a point of self destruction but as a concern more with the needs and wishes of others than with one’s own.
It is part of a good person to do great and noble deeds, though he risk everything. Plutarch

18. Discerning
Having or showing good judgment, being wise. Being mindful in your growth to be long in attention and quick in assimilation. DFL

19. Calmness
A calmness that faces every situation no matter how dire with faithfulness in self. A self efficacy that comes from growing, testing, and developing oneself and skills to be confident but not egotistic in one’s ability to achieve positive results and outcomes.

20. Joyfulness
Choosing to be pleasant regardless of outside circumstances, which ultimately lifts the spirits of others. Also finding Joy and being faithful in times of trouble as well as triumph.

21. Humanity
Not only means being part of the human race but it is humaneness; benevolence.
“he praised them for their standards of humanity, care, and dignity”
synonyms: compassion, brotherly love, fraternity, fellow feeling, philanthropy, humaneness, kindness, consideration, understanding, sympathy, tolerance.

Character traits are all the aspects of a person’s behavior and attitudes that make up that person’s personality. We will enrich our lives and those around us by mindfully developing them not because we gain from doing so but because there is virtue for virtue sake. Seeking a Noble Character is a pilgrimage for our Soul and it is a positive change that results in more positive changes.

Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, ambition inspired, and success achieved. Helen Keller
Please see some of my other related Blogs

The Pillars of Daily Self Development By DrFrankLayman

Visit my Author page on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Dr.-Frank-Layman/e/B00JBG6PH6/ref=dp_byline_cont_book_1

Thank You
DrFrankLayman
Author of: Contemplative Growth and Development; Daily Reflective Growth;
Reflections To Success; Exito A Traves Del Pensamiento Logico; and
Success Through Logical Thinking

Conflict Resolution By DrFrankLayman Part 2of2

Conflict Resolution By DrFrankLayman Part 2of2

There are times where conflict is forced upon a good person and in those cases we must be willing to stand up for what is right.

Great spirits have often encountered violent opposition from weak minds. Albert Einstein
I seek and value harmony, so sometimes I must fight for it. DFL

We discussed in part 1 how to address those challenges, in this section lets discuss the integrity of not being the opposition. Let’s work to be the positive force, one that works for consensus. Someone who builds an accord and is a positive force that tries to lift others up. Let’s be that someone who facilitate others to a better outcome, and enhances every environment to create effectiveness in harmony.
Prior to getting to an escalated level of conflict what can we do to prepare for and/or avoid engaging in them?
Let’s look at the states opposite conflict.
Antonyms for conflict
• peace
• agreement
• calm
• harmony
• concord
• stability

We want to occupy the ground that is as far from conflict as we can. The closer we get to the attributes of conflict the greater the risk we expose ourselves and others to it.
Synonyms for conflict
Clash
combat
Competition
Rivalry
Strife
Struggle
Contention

These positions lead to aggressiveness toward one another and can lead to a desire to undermine, exploit, frustrate, and malign. Maligning others by spreading discord or gossip is very detrimental to and in full opposition with creating accord. It is base and exhibits negative emotions those that not only hurt others but that are destructive to the one who posses them.
Peace is not absence of conflict; it is the ability to handle conflict by peaceful means. Ronald Reagan
We aren’t always going to be happy with people but we have to develop ourselves and be adjusted enough to be prepared for undesirable responses, actions and behaviors from others. I advocate daily self development as we are in a constant state of growth unless we actively inhibit it. Training daily advances our effectiveness and it steels us up, it fortifies our resolve and mental toughness.
It is our duty as men and women to proceed as though the limits of our abilities do not exist. Pierre Teilhard de Chardin

We can develop our cognitive maturity, leadership skills, coping mechanisms, and our intellect to gain greater capability to avoid or resolve conflict.

I believe it is far better to be a person of integrity, honesty, and transparency. I believe in virtue for virtue sake. Life isn’t a game we play alone and there are a lot of people who are malicious and want to cause discord. So we must reach for our peace internally and then share it. Let our peace and harmony diffuse throughout the space or company we occupy.

Pre-conflict preparation then is creating an inner state that spills over to our outer state creating a sphere that engulfs others into the realm of positive.
That internal space is in opposition to conflict:
• peace
• truce
• agreement
• calm
• harmony
• surrender
• accord
• concord
• stability
• kindness
• trust

Man must evolve for all human conflict a method which rejects revenge, aggression and retaliation. The foundation of such a method is love. Martin Luther King, Jr.

If you want to bring an end to long-standing conflict, you have to be prepared to compromise. Aung San Suu Kyi

Our relationships are a shared path, remember the Cs every relationship needs to stay on track: Caring Cooperation Communication.

Conflict cannot survive without your participation. Wayne Dyer

Don’t give into pettiness and jealousies be strong in integrity and work to build bridges not fences. DFL

I would also advise reading my other blogs related to advancing relationships
Top 9 Principals to Successful Communication: Developing Sincere Relationships by Dr.FrankLayman

Top 9 Principals to Successful Communication: Developing Sincere Relationships by Dr.FrankLayman

Please visit my author page on Amazon and secure some of my books on self help.

https://t.co/YYJ6f5VHuq
https://t.co/xXsU26a0om

Thank You
DrFrankLayman
Author of: Contemplative Growth and Development; Daily Reflective Growth;
Reflections To Success; Exito A Traves Del Pensamiento Logico; Success Through Logical Thinking

Resilience a Quality Worthy of Training by DrFrankLayman

Resilience a Quality Worthy of Training by DrFrankLayman

A strong positive mindset with a sense of self confidence and self efficacy along with patience and resilience can see us past our present hardship to the light of a new tomorrow. Resilience is the capacity to recover quickly from difficulties; it’s toughness: it’s the ability to spring back into shape following a hardship.

Resilience is an inner strength and tenacity that allows someone to bounce back from a failure, disappointment, or frustration to be successful at higher levels over the longer run.

For anyone to tap into this attribute it is like training anything else we wish to posses: we have to know we want to poses it, we have to make it a goal, and then we need to seek out an approach to be effective in achieving it or enhancing it.

1. Daily Self Development

DSD helps us to train for improvement in ourselves while helping us cope. It fortifies us from the daily strife we all go through and it builds us to a better future version of ourselves. It is a way of training yourself to grow and develop.

2. Self-Efficacy
One’s sense of self-efficacy can play a major role in how one approaches goals, tasks, and challenges. We build on our self efficacy by taking on challenges and tasks and refining our approach and strategies to be better at the accomplishment of them. Anyone who is skilled at something knows they have to challenge themselves, sometimes it is self driven, sometimes it is finding a coach/mentor, or maybe being in the presence of an expert. Confidence in self comes from a respect we have of ourself and our inner dialogue is immensely influential. Positive self talk, preparation, and a sound approach go a long way in the progression of self-efficacy.

3. Discernment.
The good judgment or wisdom to compare, contrast, and select that which is of optimum good for us and our future state. Resilience is tied with our mental and physical state of well being, those are made of conscious and deliberate choice. There is also the discernment to engage, when not to and when to break off engagement. Not because the challenge is hard but because it is worthy of the effort, time and resources. Working on wisdom is a very challenging undertaking it is a matter of gaining in experiences in an objective way that allows mindful inventory of attributes that resulted in success or failure, good outcomes or poor ones, great subpar and bad performances.

4. Wellness

Your state of health and wellness and how much you invest in keeping it optimize is an important part of resilience. Let’s look at how prisoners are broken down sleep deprived, poor nutrition, little to no exercise, little to no positive social connectedness, little to no positive stimulation. Use what I call the Frank rule of 180 do the opposite of a negative approach.
Prioritize good sleep, fitness, positive social connectedness and other positive stimuli (see also DSD)

5. Caring
Caring is a sincere love of having a positive impact on others which infuses a passion. Having a deep sincere concern for others and how things will work out for them. Having a mission something we are working for that is bigger than ourselves that contributes to others fosters us to give more and to endure more. Caring can allow us to see our mission through because selflessness has far more satisfaction and purpose than selfishness.

6. Toughness.
Toughness is inate in all of us but being too comfortable for too long can diminish it in us.

Toughness is:

– emotional stability especially in the face of disappointment
– a positive Perspective even when facing hard times
– strength under stress, it is the ability to perform as good if not better when the
stakes are higher
– a willingness of Preparation for challenges
– the right positive attitude toward setbacks

I love this Grit Scale

Grit Scale

Take the test and see where you are on it then if you’re not where you want see if you can’t train to improve.

7. Endurance
When we are tired we are vulnerable. Lack of endurance will make us vulnerable like it will make an athlete or an athletic team easier to beat in the latter half of a game. Build your endurance with training and as you do you will find your mental and phsyical mindset endure longer which leads to resiliency.

8. Cognitive maturity

The development of our critical thinking and our emotional IQ are profound in the impact they have on our resilience. Gaining alliances by being in tune with others and socially able gives us opportunities for support. Being more logical rather than emotional can set us to think through a barrier rather than to concede to it.

Overcome barriers by searching for the barriers weaknesses and your strengths. DFL

9. Dedication

The quality of being committed to a task or purpose. Dedication is a conscious decision. It is tied to our belief in what we are doing as well as who is doing it. You will also see greater dedication in those that have a mission/purpose. Knowing that, create a mission for yourself, mine is to help those who want to make a positive change

10. Hope, Belief and Motivation

Hope is not a stand alone strategy but the opposite of hope is hopelessness and with hopelessness comes despair. Have you ever attempted to achieve a goal in a state of despair. No, because these are incongruent and don’t work together So we have to sustain belief, a spirit within us that feeds off of the optimism we create and sustains hope which all compels us to act – they are motivating. We have to sustain hope, belief and motivation doing what it takes to stay positive during difficult times. Motivation isn’t time ill spent, it is an investment that can fuel the arrival or at least ward off exhaustion. Stay in the race until you cross the finish line. Fight until the end of the final round.

11. Achievement

Value Achievements, don’t define who we are by them. If we have a belief in ourselves we won’t faulted in the face of disappointment. Having a sense of self confidence is needed not to be shattered in the event of a failure, a miss or a frustration. That said a drive to achieve goes a long way to fuel our long journey to accomplishment.

12. Peace
We can motivate ourselves by fear to the immediacy of completing a task but long term I advocate seeking peace. I can be at peace yet at a high tempo. We often associated anxiety, fear or anger as states that allow for motivation of action but those have a negative physiological impact and are difficult to sustain without long term harm. Seeking peace with high tempo thoughtful actions will be good for the mission and for your health.

13. Focus.
Not taking our eyes off the target no matter the distress we are under, no matter how long it takes to get there. Many have unrealistic expectations for success and don’t exhaust in getting to it but become frustrated by their own making.

14. Love

If you have a why you can endure any how. Friedrich Nietzsche
Love is the most powerful reason we all have, it far exceeds any negative emotion in its power to sustain us. Love is relentless it can add to or be our Reliance.

Work on your resilience by working in these areas and you will see it is reinforced along with many other positive attributes that can help you stay in the fight longer.

It is not always the one who holds the advantage, is more prepared or is the most skilled, sometimes it is the one who can endure to the end who will succeed over all others. DFL

Put all those attributes together with resilience and you have a force to be reckoned with.

Mental Toughness, resilience, mission can allow you to stay in the game longer and that improves your probability for accomplishing your goals. Set your goals stay focused, be hungry, work diligently with a good strategy and mindset, be discerning and watch for opportunities to leverage your new found resiliency to succeed.

Thank you
DrFrankLayman

“We choose to go to the moon. We choose to go to the moon in this decade and do the other things, not because they are easy, but because they are hard, because that goal will serve to organise and measure the best of our energies and skills, because that challenge is one that we are willing to accept, one we are unwilling to postpone, and one which we intend to win, and the others, too.” JFK

Let me win, but if I cannot win, let me be brave in the attempt. Roman gladiators

I’ve missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I’ve been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed. Michael Jordan

The Joy OF Achievement by DrFrankLayman

I am inclined to say Success is an integral component to being satisfied in yourself and your life. If that tenant is accepted then understanding the component parts of success is important to achieving it.

Happiness lies in the joy of achievement and the thrill of creative effort. Franklin D. Roosevelt

How To Achieve
Your life is a delicate balance if it isn’t, we fall. Success has to be defined, understood, and clearly represented for us to achieve it.
By defining your success, you create a clear target to aim at. The taste of success leaves you wanting more, it gets you thinking positively and moving more fluidly, less inhibited. It has you refining your process to continue to grow and develop and ultimately achieve more.
What are the component parts of success
1) Wellness
Wellness is complex assortment of essential pillars that the rest of everything you do, are, and become rests on. We need to accept that as a paradigm shift in our thinking and use the approach I have set out in other writings and podcasts to achieve it.
2) Mental Toughness
Mental toughness is forged, built and trained, it can be improved in anyone who wants. Many people who have it too easy and don’t know the struggle of hardship don’t build it up. Push to your edge then your edge incrementally moves forward, then keep repeating the process. A better state of wellness also helps us become more mentally tough, it fortifies us steels us up from the hardships we all have to face.
3) Strong Bonds
True sincere relationships, positive social involvement with people we love and care about and who reciprocate those feelings.
4) Financial Freedom
To be financially free means that you have enough money so that you don’t worry about it continually, as most people do. Autonomy from what oppresses us, causing us to have to do something we don’t care for or for someone we don’t respect. Being forced to do something you are unhappy doing to get something that doesn’t result in happiness is not a good long term strategy. Achieving financial freedom is one of the most important goals we can make for ourselves and one of the most important goals to achieve for ourselves.
5) A Mission
If you have a why you can endure any how. Friedrich Nietzsche Having a commitment to something bigger than oneself keeps us in the game where we still have a chance at success. Durability and perseverance are enhanced when we fight for something of meaning.
6) Self-Awareness
To get results and advance you have to be at your best. You cant give your best if you are not at your best. DFL
7) Personal Growth and Development
Stagnant water grows toxic. Like water we need to flow being fluid and progressing carving out our legacy. DFL
8) Perseverance
I love the underdog story, in most of those stories you will see an underlying statement about perseverance. Learn to grow strong in adversity don’t wilt, win. DFL
9) Self efficacy
The belief in yourself comes from accomplishing and achieving. Start with the small and continue to build on your achievements challenging yourself and pushing the limits.
10) Leadership
The power and ability to lead not just others but self. This can be God Given or man made but anyone can enhance their leadership skills with training. The better the training approach and methodology the better the outcomes.
11) Courage to…
Courage is an action.
The courage to take action, The courage to stand up to fear – fear of failure or fear of success and move forward is an integral part of success.
Take Action, set up your goals looking at them through the lens of logical thought, distill them into tasks, distill the tasks to component parts, seek out information and resources that will be needed, then start. Be prepared for barriers, take time to refine and strategically prepare. Don’t lose your motivation, keep the fires burning. Commit to DSD, Don’t neglect your innovation or imagination.
Don’t set limits on the heights you can obtain. Be patient, almost all things take longer than expected and if our expectations are unreasonable or impractical we stand to lose on a winner due to frustration.

Put your heart, mind, and soul into even your smallest acts. This is the secret of success. Swami Sivananda

Success is no accident. It is hard work, perseverance, learning, studying, sacrifice and most of all, love of what you are doing or learning to do. Pele

Success is progressive development of self. DFL
DrFrankLayman
Author

Model Leadership: Mentorship As Part Of Your Leadership Paradigm by DrFrankLayman

Model Leadership: Mentorship As Part Of Your Leadership Paradigm by DrFrankLayman

Mentorship is a relationship in which a more experienced and more knowledgeable person guides a less experienced or less knowledgeable person in pursuit of growing and developing in understanding and application of skill/s.

Leadership is a skill and it transcends any environment or condition. We don’t always look at it as a formal skill to be trained but that is exactly what I am advocating and speaking to in this writing.

Healthy Leadership is needed to sustain success in any endeavor for a prolonged period of time. Those businesses with healthier more rational Leadership have a competitive advantage and greater sustainability. Sustainability will be limited if the values skills and disposition of a culture of Leadership are not passed on and that is where mentoring has a positive impact.

A true succession plan for a person or a company starts with a mission beyond self interest. DFL

Succession is dependent on the passage of leadership and the most effective vehicle is Mentorship. The calling of a True Leader is to develop those around them to create an environment fit and ready to accomplish the mission at hand while preparing for the next advancement. This paradigm should be adopted by a rational leader because it allows opportunity for growth, sustainability, and legacy.
If we concede the importance of attempting to translate leadership characteristics and actual responsibilities then we have to agree on what a leader is. A leader has to sustain morale, encourage, teach, coach, train and address deficiencies by being reliable, trustworthy, and effective. They have to grow and develop these qualities in themselves and those they are responsible for. We develop ourselves when we develop others. The virtue of mentoring goes well beyond the transposition of knowledge it truly is of translating understanding, skill, and effectiveness to another/others. Mentoring is fundamental to the passage of leadership and it is how we leave a legacy, our indelible mark. There is a great responsibility to take on the challenge of mentoring because it requires a great effort to seek to do the best possible job in developing another. There is also a responsibility for the mentored not take advantage of the kindness and assistance. There begins a paradox the old guard gives up its’ knowledge and can become vulnerable in uselessness. Some unethical systems or people take advantage of this state of transition to eliminate the old guard. This tactic may have short term effective impact but like all unethical schemes it has long term negative implications. The implication is that it creates a new negative culture, established with uncertainty, doubt and mistrust. A culture without trust is a mob soon to disburse or destruct.
Establishing a culture of leadership requires exhibiting values then teaching them and all being able to depend on them. Wisdom in leadership is balance, balance in response and individualizing response to challenge, difficulty, or hardship while maintaining steadfastness to principles and self efficacy. To the point that transparency in leadership reveals something worthy in the leader, that is illuminating and worthy of emulating. Those characteristics too subtle to observe need to be articulate and that is where mentoring has it’s most direct and profound impact on the passage of success.
A good leader tells, a great leader teaches, a true leader enables. There is a complexity of variables that allows for someone to be successful and the higher you ascend in a carrier the harder it is to solve complex problems, be innovative and advance. It really requires mentoring to ascend further than we can climb on our own. Effective mentoring is like anything else worthy of being effective, at such, teaching, coaching etc.. it takes thoughtfulness, planning and execution. Not everyone is worthy of the time or effort so be objective, don’t chose based on your like of a person. It takes discernment in where and who you invest your time.
Vet those you mentor and those you want to be mentored by, the wrong type of person will assail your kindness.
This is not an excuse not to reach out. Fear does not determine the courageous actions that beckon us. DFL

Life lived well steeped in altruism and humanity is a legacy to be gifted to those worthy of receiving it.

Reasons to Mentor
– Reaching down and help someone rise up
– Growing and developing others helps you to grow
– Enhancing challenges in your own career
– Improving your understanding of fundamentals
– Can lead to increasing your creativity
– Builds a legacy

Reasons to seek and gain a Mentor
– Challenges you
– Allows you to grow faster
– Allows you to move further
– Develop further the infrastructure of growth and culture of leadership
– Realization of Broader more diverse applications and effectiveness
– Allows you to advance in contributions
– Helps to improve performance and effectiveness

Your Leadership paradigm needs to be a part of your true inner self displayed in a way that can be received without interpretation. DFL
Being transparent, true, competent, and reliable are the best ways to imprint yourself on your culture and be a sustaining influencer.

For all there is virtue in doing virtues acts.
Seeking to better yourself will allow you to do so
Seeking to better someone else will allow you to better yourself

I recently did a lecture entitled: A LEADER OF ONE for the LIFT program I volunteer with in my community and I can tell you first hand, it is very satisfying to assume the responsibility and be the conduit for the passage of insight, wisdom, or skill.
Mentorship is a great opportunity to advance others and yourself.

“A Candle Loses Nothing by Lighting Another Candle.” Italian Proverb

Thank you
DrFrankLayman
Author of: Contemplative Growth and Development; Daily Reflective Growth;
Reflections To Success; Success Through Logical Thinking

Daily Self Development (DSD) – Approaching Life With The Intent Of Improving It by DrFrankLayman

Daily Self Development (DSD): Approaching Life With The Intent Of Improving It
by DrFrankLayman

Added to any situation, group, or dynamic are you confident you would impress upon it your positive impact. How many of us are living day to day just trying to get by, never mind looking to advance. Most will come to see the enthusiasm of hope worn down by the longevity of process. We all start off assuming there will be more tail winds than head winds in our life, in our relationships, and in our carrier. Those not durable enough to endure will never find their finish line, they will never reach their potential, gain the ground they want and that causes so many so much frustration. Frustration is an emotion that occurs when we are inhibited from reaching a set goal or desired result. When we reach our goals, when we achieve and accomplish something it brings with it self efficacy, confidence, and happiness. Winning environments can be trained that is why there are dynasties in sports. In ourselves result oriented mindsets can be formulated, we can train ourselves to be mentally strong, rational and effective.
Frustration is what causes us to give in, give up, compromise, or lose interest. Typical response to frustration are anger, quitting (burn out or giving up), loss of self-esteem and self-confidence, stress, sadness and depression declined self efficacy. Frustration results in a hindrance to all the things that are in opposition to what resulted from it i.e. enthusiasm, joy, satisfaction, peace, happiness and self confidence.

Frustration is looking past this moment you have to a future moment you want. DFL

There are times I have noticed that the goal or desired outcome made are sound but the time frame is unrealistic. The skill set pocessed has not been acquired, in short, preparations haven’t fully been made.

What can be done to improve results, meet goals, and gain positive outcomes (desired endings)? We can start by self development, I can make many arguments why this approach has mutli-variant positive impacts in our lives. The goal of life should be success. I define success as the progressive development of self. We all don’t start with the same advantages, talents, or opportunities but we all start with the desire to grow and develop to be and do more. So define success as you will but for me it is in self development and that is one of the reasons I advocate Daily Self Development (DSD). Thinking you will just advance without working for it is like an athlete thinking they are going to the big show without training just hoping and dreaming it will happen. We need to do the same train everyday for a better future. I also believe that daily self development if done with the correct focus can help steel us up, fortify our will and mental toughness along with our physical and mental endurance. Without a doubt commitment to true change, a paradigm shift is what I am advocating. Habit, rigid scheduling, and routine are good short term approaches but what I am advocating goes far beyond that, it goes to a new perspective. Long term we will internally rebel against a rigid structure but it can help with the transition until we have accepted a new way of thinking about ourselves. I might regress but that isn’t me, I am not going to dismiss myself or demean myself but know that my true self will reemerged another day. I will have more training days than missed days and over time a compounding effect will get me to a better future me and one who is far more prepared to go the distance and weather the bad storms and become who I am meant to be.

Fulfillment and disappointment are close neighbors ensure you have the correct approach to get to the destination you desire to arrive at. DFL

There is no struggle big enough to crush my spirit. DFL

Live in today while preparing for tomorrow. DFL

Forgive your past, engage in your present, and prepare for your future. DFL

Get started today by reading my books and blogs, listening to my podcasts and by thinking, being, behaving, and acting in a positive way. Make the shift of mindset and commit and train daily.

I wish yall the Very Best!!!

DrFrankLayman

Thank The Passer: Not Just A Gesture For Basketball But One For Business By DrFrankLayman

Thank The Passer: Not Just A Gesture For Basketball But One For Business
DrFrankLayman

Thank the passer by taking an eighth of a second to point-to-the-passer and acknowledge their selflessness. This quick and simple gesture is an action that promotes team unity.

The Origins of the acknowledgement

In the 60’s and 70’s a conversation between Dean Smith and John Wooden initiated a basketball tradition of generosity and unselfishness. The goal was simple to initiate an overt gesture to build team unity by acknowledgement. Coach Dean Smith asked players on the UNC men’s basketball teams to recognize the unselfish act of a teammate’s pass to them.

It became a team rule. In practices, games, and other Tar Heel basketball activities, the man who scored had to point-to-the-passer.

Dean Smith was a great leader who mentored others to be great leaders and this acknowledgement he built into a habitual exhibit of appreciation demonstrates his brilliance as a mentor, coach, and leader. Not acknowledging others that have helped us and participated in our success is greedy, selfish, entitled, and demonstrates the weakness of self doubt.

True leaders want to recognize everyone who contribute and do it in a fair and consistent way.DFL

This gesture in basketball is linear it acknowledges the last pass that lead to scoring while in business it isn’t as easy and we have to be mindful confident and fair enough to take the time to acknowledge other contributors.

The absence of acknowledgement is neglect and to neglect someone is a slight – it is disrespectful and leads away from a good relationship, not toward it.

I want those in my charge to feel fairly rewarded with acknowledgement and I want each one of them to be aggressively recognizing those who made a considerable contribution above, below, and across their station.

This is all based on honesty, fairness, and mindfulness realizing that acknowledgements, compliments, and recognition are earned they are not just given away. If they aren’t earned or truly challenging enough to warrant they will have no meaning or impact to motivate future great work, thought, or action.

I do believe in praising that which deserves to be praised. Dean Smith

If I have seen further than others, it is by standing upon the shoulders of giants. Isaac Newton

Take your yourself and those in your sphere of influence further by being generous and positive and freely communicating it and showing it. Take the risk and be brave enough to so you care.

I worry that business leaders are more interested in material gain than they are in having the patience to build up a strong organization, and a strong organization starts with caring for their people. John Wooden

Thank you

DrFrankLayman

The Legacy of Achievement: Stall Descent and Ascend. By Dr.FrankLayman

The Legacy of Achievement: Stall Descent and Ascend. By Dr.FrankLayman

Decay is inherent in all compounded things. Strive on with diligence. Buddha

Decay is a naturally occurring process and requires action to stall, diminish, or resolve. In our life time we will have an accelerated growth and development until one day we don’t. What causes that decline is interesting to me. Why does that decline occur to so many yet there are those who are always growing and developing, they stall the decent extending the journey and their positive influence along with it. Harland Sanders, Ray Kroc, Henry Ford (all late bloomers to success) understood that diligence makes for opportunity. We are not to just sit by idly and watch the world go by along with our life. We need to engage in the world in a dedicated, deliberate, and durable manner. The intent should be to grow and develop into what we want not be complacent or self destructive. There are no overnight successes and we are all fighting the process of decay. Some will chose a better path to this naturally occurring processes, I strongly advocate daily self development as a way to cope with the difficulties of life and also to gain a compounding effect. Small changes overtime can lead to great achievements and advancements.

I had three friends in high school. One had it all with an early start from his parents he was athletic, wealthy, and intelligent. The other friend was always just there he engaged in a way that took little thought and energy. Then there was the one he was poor but always worked hard. He dedicated himself everyday. Nothing came easy everything was a struggle for him. They all made it through high school. The BMOC went to a large school and became average, the complacent guy went to a school close enough to live home. The hard working guy worked hard every day went on to college and excelled. They all did well for themselves one exceeded the others and has the likelihood of the best future. Can you anticipate who that is? Now tell me why.

Large things come from small deliberate steps made consistently over a life time. Change occurs but is not instant, it takes time. To build on a large scale we have to chip away at it or deliberately go about adding to it, compounding our impact over a lifetime. It is not always condition but approach that makes people successful.DFL Neglect decays things slowly over time so the antidote as it requires engagement, action is needed to stop the advance of decline and mindfulness and approach to grow from it. The star athlete who is now overweight and in a dead end career and the gymnast who is unhappy at her work and in her relationship they decayed and are on a decline. The high school student voted most likely to succeed who is living a common existence. This isn’t out of the ordinary, it is in fact typical. Many things will come into play as to whether we sustain growth or diminish and decline over time. Where we start out isn’t an indicator of success, It is more about our approach and mindset to growth. Are we going to challenge ourselves everyday to grow and develop. Are we going to advance in our preparation or just exist. Are we going to take deliberate steps to be create a better future version of ourselves.

Unmanaged resources become liabilities. DFL

Starting on this path isn’t always pretty, as anyone who has decided to change experiences everyone wants it to be immediate and comes out of the gate set on fire. Anyone who has ever gotten their car stuck in mudd can attest slamming on an accelerator in mud is messy and can get you stuck deeper. The best strategy is slow steady application of the accelerator without wavering. Small changes daily over an long period of time create sustained growth and true development. The point then is that it is in mindfulness and deliberate daily development that can allow the advance against the odds or against inhospitable circumstance and sustain it.

He who labors diligently need never despair; for all things are accomplished by diligence and labor. Menander of Athens

Because of mindfulness and durability given enough time I will prevail. Not because I’m the best or the smartest and definitely not because of circumstance. I’ll advance because of the positive mindset and dedication to daily development I’ve followed. I will continue this coarse and gain in my advances and with the longevity that comes from it I will enhance my legacy. I’ve helped a lot of people realize their potential in this way, advocating daily development and because it’s overlap with coping skills it makes for a sustainable and successful approach. Coping skills are needed for us to navigate the challenge which life is at times. I don’t believe in strict regimens as they are not sustainable over time. I also think them mundane and boring which depletes creativity. I believe where ever you are now with the right approach you can slowly take yourself to where you want to be. First you need a hard target, then mental toughness, self efficacy, an approach and a plan. Then a check list of action to take, then relentless advancement especially in the face of barriers which requires adaptability. Then once you have arrived the willingness to take aim and advance further building to a new goal. The trickiest part is to view it all with gratitude and happiness.

Ultimately I like for those I advise to be well rounded (see my pillars of self development Blog) devoted to daily self development then to advance in a mission and work to improve leadership skills and become a business leader advancing still to find ways to become an entrepreneur. Life is too short to sit idly by.

You can be idle hoping or active achieving. DFL

There is not only a sense of value of self in achievement, there is happiness in being creative, problem solving, working and reaching a goal especially when that goal aligns with your personal mission.

Recently, I spoke at Hire Heroes and discussed the importance of daily self development as an approach to advancing professionalism in a career path, as a business leader, and/or as an entrepreneur. Performance is critical in these areas and professionalism is required and as discussed durability, and sustainability of effectiveness is necessary to continue to grow or at the least prevent descent.

Don’t limit yourself and don’t let anyone pigeon hole you, become who you are meant to be. Entrepreneurs come in all shapes and sizes they are not bound to being one thing. Don’t judge others ability to become an entrepreneur or your own.

We are only limited by our gender, physicality, SES, or past if we accept them as barriers. DFL

What entrepreneurs have in common is mindfulness, drive, durability and an effective approach. Longevity achieved by daily development generates the momentum of a compounding effect if we don’t wilt once it is discovered that success is a mountain climb, not a sprint. DFL

For more on the legacy of achievement please see my other writings and my book

Success Through Logical Thinking

 

Dr.FrankLayman

 

Advancing Mindset: Not Who You Are But Who You are Meant To Be by Dr.FrankLayman

Advancing Mindset: Not Who You Are But Who You are Meant To Be                     by Dr.FrankLayman

When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be. LaoTzu

A Mindset:

1. The ideas thoughts and attitudes with which a person approach and responds to come to a solution especially in the face of difficult circumstances.
2. A fixed mental attitude or disposition that predetermines a person’s response
3. An inclination
To advance your mindset or in some cases set your mindset it helps to seek inspiring, challenging, motivating words, people, and opportunities. The words can be chosen from a selected work or from a sampling of many works. It can be from observing someone very accomplished who holds a a strong positive mindset. We can not know what a person’s mindset is until it is tested then we have the ability to see it in response, words, and actions. Quotes are a great start they let you into some of the conceptual thoughts the author has and may believe to be helpful. Words are sometimes helpful in addressing the frustrations of life. We can use these powerful words to shape our thoughts, we can challenge ourselves in taking on situations, assignments and challenges that help us to grow in this area. When reading, write down and memorize inspirational and motivational words that can help you and be of help to someone else with the new perspective you now have and the fitting words that will be at your disposal. They are awesome for yourself to adopt as a mantra or to help uplift yourself and others. The greater purpose should be in digging deeper into the authors work, to generate curiosity which leads back to the body of work or to approach those with a strong mindset and seek their understanding by engaging them. I like to see the time frame the work was written and what the author has gone through to arrive at the epiphany or talk with the person and ask of them how they came to their mindset. Some works are written and are fixed to their moment in time, some quotes are timeless and not bound by condition.

It is amazing how the words of others can resonate with us and even help us to a paradigm/mindset shift or advancement . We all have a favorites quotes that helped us through hard times or encouraged us to higher heights so I asked a few of my friends, who are very well established in their lives, what their favorite quotes are and I provide them below. my hope is if you are in the beginning or middle of your ascent they can be used, added to your plan to ascend –

What are your favorite quotes- tweet them with the hashtag #STLTmindset and tag me @DrSTLT

I went to those I felt realized their potential and were successful and well adjusted for their favorite quotes. I asked them for quotes that helped them to achieve goals or stay motivated or just that made them reflect. I also wondered about the most enduring and thus most relevant and powerful quotes, the ones that endured and that they found themselves going back to, especially in times of trouble. I enjoyed the responses I got and was enlightening by some of the answers. I will share the quotes and knowing those who provided them, will give insight and some interpretation. My hope is those who are starting out, or on the cusp, or who are themselves successful can use this to advance themselves.

Ephisans 4:32 Be kind to one another

The person who offered this is a CEO. He is essentially dedicated to being a Consensus builder. His mindset is one of a servant leader which has made so many others including himself successful. His altruism reminds me of the value of virtue for virtue sake.

Success is not measured by a value but by the extent of commitment to self improvement. DFL

The person who offered this up is a very successful soldier and professional. He is dedicated to self development and has been very committed to my work. He has seen the virtue that can come from self development and the satisfaction and happiness that follows it and despite set backs it is the attempt and dedication to him that matters most. Since he is pursuing it aggressively he has now advanced himself further than he had ever thought possible. His perspective is that advancing himself allows him to take others with him, cope in bad situations, and advance because of the resilience of his daily effort and dedication.

Stop worrying about things that you can’t change.

Another businessman who knows the struggle of deep waters. That just when you get past one challenge you face another and that you have to focus your energy and power on the things you have true influence over. He adds it must be a positive influence used to exert over a situation and that comes from a strong mindset – one that has at its core self belief.

Never talk defeat. Use words like hope, belief, faith, victory. Norman Vincent Peale

The person who offered this is a female business person. A great accolade as any additional barrier to success gives further recognition to the success of the mindset that allowed it to occur.

In her presence you had better not talk in the negative. Problems are opportunities and there is always an answer to a problem, some problems are more complex and require a more thoughtful and provoking answer.

She influences her environment and those within it by thinking, being, and reacting positively.

That type of positive mindset takes a strong conscious effort and many will try to subvert it. She has found her success with this mindset and advocates it to all wise enough to listen to her.

Your mindset is yours for the making, take from others who are further along in the journey or have advanced to where you want to be. The point is you need to create it and then in the hardest of times not abandon it.

Hardship should harden our resolve not our heart. DFL

Resilience of mind, dedication to mission, and a strong mindset are elements of success and/or happiness and peace.

Keep working on your mindset and share your revelations with others. To be great is not enough, we should strive to excel and then to help those who want and are willing to advance.

Every day devote your time to the things that matter. Time is a commodity invest it in the right things and it will yield dividends.

To improve your mindset work on:

#1 Having a Personal Mission

Mine: Help those who want to make a positive change.

#2 Developing Your Defensive Mental Shield

A sound mind can withstand any insult, slight, or betrayal. DFL

Mental toughness is trained in athletes and it is possible to develop in anyone who sees its value.

#3 Advancing Mindfulness

Stay and be in this moment, enjoying it for its challenge or pleasure and yield your best performance.

#4 Embracing Logical and Critical Thinking

Read my book for insight into achieving Success Through Logical Thinking

#5 Assuming Altruism

Devote yourself to others the worst thing you can become is an unethical and/or selfish success as success doesn’t equate to significance.

#6 Building Cognitive Maturity

High emotional IQ one aware of ETTs and strong in self awareness. Every feeling we have is not justified and every thought we hold is not always true should be evaluated for its authenticity. See my Blog on ETTs for greater depth of the topic.

#7 Enhancing Focus

Distractions widen the gaff from where you are to where you want to be.

#8 Searching for Positive Personal Connectedness

Every condition you find yourself in requires a choice to change remain or worsen chose wisely who you associate with and who you befriend.

#9 Expanding Creativity and Innovation

These are not only God given but they are sought and must be developed. There are some great approaches to enhancing oblique thinking.
#10 Developing Durability – Learn and Grow from Adversity

It is the the load but how you carry it perceive and what you do to learn and let it work to make you better.

Those who are durable can outlast defeat. DFL

#11 Growing in Courage

Courage counts because every worthy action is preceded by a positive thought and the courage to act.

#12 Dedicating to Spirituality

We must develop ourselves fully and this is an area many draw peace from and peace is essential for a well developed and impermeable mindset.

 

You can improve yourself by letting go and reaching for a more polished version of yourself but you have to go after it it doesn’t happen without your will and your want. Build yourself, immerse yourself in daily growth and development and as you grow so too will grow your opportunities.

 

Dr. Frank Layman

Success Through Logical Thinking

#STLTmindset