Thank The Passer: Not Just A Gesture For Basketball But One For Business By DrFrankLayman

Thank The Passer: Not Just A Gesture For Basketball But One For Business

Thank the passer by taking an eighth of a second to point-to-the-passer and acknowledge their selflessness. This quick and simple gesture is an action that promotes team unity.

The Origins of the acknowledgement

In the 60’s and 70’s a conversation between Dean Smith and John Wooden initiated a basketball tradition of generosity and unselfishness. The goal was simple to initiate an overt gesture to build team unity by acknowledgement. Coach Dean Smith asked players on the UNC men’s basketball teams to recognize the unselfish act of a teammate’s pass to them.

It became a team rule. In practices, games, and other Tar Heel basketball activities, the man who scored had to point-to-the-passer.

Dean Smith was a great leader who mentored others to be great leaders and this acknowledgement he built into a habitual exhibit of appreciation demonstrates his brilliance as a mentor, coach, and leader. Not acknowledging others that have helped us and participated in our success is greedy, selfish, entitled, and demonstrates the weakness of self doubt.

True leaders want to recognize everyone who contribute and do it in a fair and consistent way.DFL

This gesture in basketball is linear it acknowledges the last pass that lead to scoring while in business it isn’t as easy and we have to be mindful confident and fair enough to take the time to acknowledge other contributors.

The absence of acknowledgement is neglect and to neglect someone is a slight – it is disrespectful and leads away from a good relationship, not toward it.

I want those in my charge to feel fairly rewarded with acknowledgement and I want each one of them to be aggressively recognizing those who made a considerable contribution above, below, and across their station.

This is all based on honesty, fairness, and mindfulness realizing that acknowledgements, compliments, and recognition are earned they are not just given away. If they aren’t earned or truly challenging enough to warrant they will have no meaning or impact to motivate future great work, thought, or action.

I do believe in praising that which deserves to be praised. Dean Smith

If I have seen further than others, it is by standing upon the shoulders of giants. Isaac Newton

Take your yourself and those in your sphere of influence further by being generous and positive and freely communicating it and showing it. Take the risk and be brave enough to so you care.

I worry that business leaders are more interested in material gain than they are in having the patience to build up a strong organization, and a strong organization starts with caring for their people. John Wooden

Thank you


Diplomacy: 8 Keys To Realize Positive Influence by Dr.FrankLayman

Diplomacy: 8 Keys To Realize Positive Influence
To be diplomatic means to positively influence by evaluating a situation before jumping to a conclusion, speaking or acting. By doing so we improve our probability of taking the best possible course of action without being brash, bold and/or condescending. It requires sound critical thinking and judgment, grace, poise, subtlety, and knowing how and what to say to be diplomatic. It requires sincerity and cognitive maturity. While diplomacy can be difficult in certain situations, especially in those that are emotionally charged, there are a few things to remember that can make it easier.

1. Slow down the tempo, breath, relax, focus and think
There is so much chaos in some situations we can get blinded by it. We can’t let that ourselves be negatively influenced, we have to control our mind. We need to learn to relax, calm down, take a deep breath and try to see how we can make things work rather than letting the momentum of negative emotions overwhelm us. DFL

2. Review the facts and check them
The facts will speak for themselves. Ralph Chaplin

3. Plan what you are going to say and how you are going to say it as to influence the outcome positively
Well conceived thoughts spoken responsibly can create cooperation and avoid discord. DFL

4. Adopt a none confrontational tone, demeanor and posture
Your body language and facial expression speak before you and at times in contradiction of you. DFL

5. Don’t get side tracked or baited
He who angers you conquers you. Elizabeth Kenny

6. Return to the facts
Seek truth from objective fact finding to come to a fair assessment. DFL
7. Stay calm and confident
Keep your mind clear yet alert, remain calm and confident and always in command of yourself. By doing so, you will then find greater effectiveness in your diplomacy.

We are not defined merely by what we do, but what we constrain ourselves from doing. – Dr Frank Layman

8. Keep in mind the value of the relationship and what is at stake but not in a way to deter your convictions but to monitor your impact.
By focusing on all that is important we retain what is of value while influencing a purge of what is caustic. DFL

I see it all the time, the poorer the diplomacy employed by leaders and team members the less effective and the more disruptive the culture. If more leaders where more contentious about being diplomatic they would be more successful in not only the retention of talent but the advancement of peak performance in them.
Everyone no matter the environment or position they hold should strive to be diplomatic.
Diplomacy is not waffling but influencing from a position of rational thoughts and behavior.
I speak from a perspective based off my book , entrepreneur experiences, administrative position and Military service. I often say if we accept that we are all leaders then being more effective as a leader can realize a positive impact in any setting we cohabit-work,school,home,church,etc… Diplomacy can help our effectiveness in any environment or situation.

The purer your Leadership is of sincerity transparency and truth the purer it will be received and responded to. DrFrankLayman

The purer your Leadership is of sincerity transparency and truth the purer it will be received and responded to. DrFrankLayman

Use not diplomacy to get your way for by the very definition we have set here, it is to influence the path of truth with the least amount of harm and the greatest amount of positive impact.

I encourage all to continue your daily self development. There are not limits on your growth, your effectiveness, and your success – unless you stop working to improve them.
See also my other blogs and book. Keep a watch for other writings coming soon and should you not want to wait consider contacting me about setting up unique and individualized speaking engagement.


Establishing Rapport: Build Strategic Partners by First Building Sincere Relationships. DFL

Establishing Rapport
Build strategic partners by first building sincere relationships. DFL

Relationship and positive social connectedness matter to your growth the growth of others and your book of business. Your rapport with others is important to you as a person and will help you grow your achievements and successes. Relationships tend to develop over long periods of time but rapport can be established immediately. Have you ever felt compelled to talk with a stranger, just meet someone and connect? Of course. If you have been compelled to it others have felt the same.what we need to tap into is how can we develop rapport in a short amount of time?

I will attempt to answer that question and in doing so I hope to provide invaluable wisdom for you to apply.
1. Be sincere. Be sincere in your motives and intention. The goal should always a win win.
Strategic partnerships are best started with sincere relationships
You have to search your own motives. What are your intentions? They matter because there are subtle cues people pick up on that can inhibit rapport from developing. When you have the peace of knowing transparency, you will understand its benefits to enhance your ability to connect with others.

2. Be welcoming. Reach out to others in your posture, vocal tones, word selections, and yes – your thoughts. Body language is read, facial expressions are judged and interpreted, so if you have a RBF practice in a mirror softening it.
Think of something that makes you happy and bookmark it in your mind and draw on it. This is not a game of deception, rule number one – honesty transparency and sincerity are always at play. Thinking positive helps our disposition to be positive and this is utilized to give you the opportunity to develop rapport.

3. Be prepared. Be prepared because people gravitate to those who know how. You become the resource that people seek when you are a subject matter expert. The only way to display your knowledge is in the conversations you have. Don’t underestimate the power of communication so be prepared to speak clearly, pause and banter, engage and be an active listener. A good conversation is like a great volley in tennis. Adjust your technique for those who are introverted with less talk more gaps and don’t think of the awkwardness but rather embrace the difference and be prepared for it.
We don’t seek exclusion we desire inclusion and that emanates from our facial expression, posture words and respect we show.

4. Breach the line of defense. We are taught from a young age to fear strangers and rightfully so. At times that barrier, that wall of security has to be scaled with an opening statement, joke (careful with jokes I have seen too many blow up) praise, or question etc…

5. Don’t be superficial. Remember names, interests, and family for when you follow up again and because you are genuinely interested in them. Remember this isn’t a game to fake it, as so many do, this is to truly connect. If you are superficial all you will have is superficial relationships, you will never know the true satisfaction of a true relationship.

6. Suspend judgement. We like for the positive we love despite the negative.If the negatives don’t tip the scale have grace enjoy them and love anyway. Don’t judge yourself above or below anyone or the act of thinking it will manifest to the behavior of being it.

7. Follow Up. Your Initial meeting by writing a note or sending an email, call, or text and be patient, people may not always reply so be prepared to accept that maturely and don’t let it dissuade you or create resentment inside you toward them.

8. Invite them out. Extend an Invitation, Invite your new friend out for coffee dinner or lunch. At that point you are beyond rapport and you have yourself a new friend.

Expand your social universe for the sake of others and yourself. To do that it truly helps to be generous with your time and gifts. Meet people where they are and appreciate them for who they are be thoughtful, sincere, and kind. If the relationship grows your business that is a bonus but not the only motive.

Rapport is cultivated by sincere, meaningful, affirming contacts and is nurtured by mutual trust and transparency. Once rapport is developed it can evolve to friendship and possibly to networking and other opportunities. You will want to help others because you have a bond and they will want to help you. The point is if that can’t help or don’t or chose not to or don’t have resource to help you still have a positive relationship with them. This process takes time and patience.

These easy principles you will find will get you on the fast track. At some point many of the strategic relationships you develop will lead to strategic opportunities.

I hope you will find the courage to reach out to others, it takes courage and confidence to put yourself out there, but it is worth it. I would challenge you to keep track of your contacts and build your network by starting today developing rapport.

Dr. Frank Layman