Conflict Resolution By DrFrankLayman Part 1 of 2

Conflict Resolution

I was recently invited by a group to speak about Conflict Resolution. I enjoyed exploring the topic and presenting what I found. It allowed me to reflect and was well received by the audience so I thought it might be helpful in this format.

Conflict resolution is a way for two or more parties to find a peaceful solution to a disagreement among them.
The disagreement may be personal, financial, political, or emotional.

When a dispute arises, often the best course of action is negotiation to resolve the dispute.

In life there are more head winds than tail winds, so being prepared for different situations, opinions, and personalities is important to mitigate disputes.

This is especially true with entry into a new culture.
Organizations not only have cultures but they contain subcultures which are influenced by the work they share.
Upon entry into a new culture, culture shock can occur. Culture shock can happen when entering into a new organization with an established culture or even moving within departments within the same organization.

Employees are people and people have a need to belong. Some cultures are so unified they exclude new entries, and some will haze new entries prior to admittance.
Some people entering a new organization and adapt they learn the rules of the culture and integrate into it, some will never belong, and others play by the rules while they work to influence changes.

Cultural shock and fitting in are referred to as organizational socialization.
Organizational socialization is a dynamic ongoing process that passes along how the organization wants its people to think, perceive, feel, and behave about their processes. This can change with changes in personnel or when roles within an organization change. A company’s culture isn’t just defined by its policies, systems, procedures and operations but how fairly and consistently it’s leadership enforces them. Then as we discussed previously
there are subcultures that have their own structure rules and followers.
In an attempt to formally socialize employees into a company culture, orientations are utilized. Informal socialization is taut on the job by peer learning is often at odds with corporate intent. When these two integration entries are not aligned discord is more probable.
Discord leads to conflict.
Conflict is an opposing action of incompatible positions: an antagonistic state or action (as of divergent ideas, interests, or persons). A disconnection of interests or desires.

Whatever the root causes of conflict we have to ask – can they be resolved and better yet can they be avoided?
Some conflicts create too great a wound to heal. Understanding this should motivate us to improve our approach for interacting and responding to others.
I believe it is far better to be a person of integrity, honesty, and transparency. I believe in virtue for virtue sake. I am also rational and will say provoking an engagement that could lead to a lifelong unresolved conflict. That kind of liability can be detrimental to anyone, no one needs that kind of threat, no matter how powerful they maybe.

There are times where conflict is forced upon a good person and in those cases we must be willing to stand up for what is right.
Great spirits have often encountered violent opposition from weak minds. Albert Einstein

Some environments are so toxic we not only need to stand up for ourselves but respect ourselves enough to exit.
Prior to getting to an escalated level of conflict what can we do to prepare for and/or avoid engaging in them?

We can develop our cognitive maturity, leadership skills, coping mechanisms, and our intellect to gain greater capability to avoid or resolve conflict.

Cognitive maturity can be taught or developed but learning doesn’t guarantee that it will be employed in the heat of the exchange.
Will the knowledge translate to the desired behavior or will a human’s default mechanism kick in. When we are attacked we have a sympathetic nervous system that prepares us for fight or flight. Our rational mind has to override these primary reflexes or defaults.
Some people know what to do in a difficult situation and can execute, others find themselves helpless to their emotional triggers.
Emotional triggers can sabotage desired responses, their programmed default trumps their training.
Some people are very manipulative and for selfish reason, pleasure, or advantage they like to manipulate others into an emotional response, to get under their skin.
I am discerning for those who are like this and don’t tolerate them on any team I build. They create discord with their manipulation and subversive bullying.
They like to be the anonymous voice that yells out to insight a crowd, the one who blows things out of proportion to get a more exaggerated response, the one who initiates the gossip.
Others aren’t always the cause sometimes the culprit is found within.
Some emotional responses are self sabotage and can be related to low self esteem or self efficacy.
Emotional responses can also be an avoidance technique as many times leadership will stop asking these people to go above and beyond. This causes an injustice which causes discord in many organizations. Personally I ascribe to rewarding the good and addressing the manipulative, they either will rise up or out. Most leaders don’t want the confrontation or work it takes to manage these kinds of people so what you see more often is the top performers being pushed more and the low performers being avoided.
This makes me wonder -Do emotional responses exist in relation to our cognitive maturity or is it an inverse relationship?
Are emotional responses a part of ETTs.

Emotional thinking traps are a term I coined from my many experiences in ownership, leadership, and military service. ETTs are patterns of thinking that are counterproductive to objective analysis and critical thinking. Objectivity is the clear lens from which truth can be seen and much can be gained. Emotional thinking is a fog that imposes reactions that are not filtered and not conducive to success. They go back to base responses and avoid higher order thinking. We are all intimately familiar with the devastating wake emotional thinking traps can leave. It is always a surprise to me how we keep falling into them. ETTs can be persistent barriers to our self improvement. Developing our mind is one of the influential keys to diminishing the toll ETTs can exact. The mind influences the enterprise of the brain which influences every thought and feeling we have. When the Mind is untrained it falls to immature patterns primal base responses.

Next time you are faced with a difficult situation or antagonistic person who attempts to create potential conflict, pause and slow things down. Step outside yourself to truly analyze what is driving and determining your verbal responses and behavior choices.

In the case of:
Minor infraction – show grace
Medium infraction – listen, discuss and work toward a mutually beneficial outcome
Multiple medium infractions – discuss, negotiate and work toward positive change
A large infraction – attempt negotiations if failed seek justice while removing yourself from the insulting environment.

Have enough respect for yourself not to allow a provoked over response or insult, and not to back down.

I am a warrior, while I believe in forgiveness for some things, I demand justice. DFL

I seek and value harmony, so sometimes I must fight for it. DFL

Thank you
DrFrankLayman
Author of: Contemplative Growth and Development; Daily Reflective Growth;
Reflections To Success; Exito A Traves Del Pensamiento Logico; Success Through Logical Thinking

Resilience a Quality Worthy of Training by DrFrankLayman

Resilience a Quality Worthy of Training by DrFrankLayman

A strong positive mindset with a sense of self confidence and self efficacy along with patience and resilience can see us past our present hardship to the light of a new tomorrow. Resilience is the capacity to recover quickly from difficulties; it’s toughness: it’s the ability to spring back into shape following a hardship.

Resilience is an inner strength and tenacity that allows someone to bounce back from a failure, disappointment, or frustration to be successful at higher levels over the longer run.

For anyone to tap into this attribute it is like training anything else we wish to posses: we have to know we want to poses it, we have to make it a goal, and then we need to seek out an approach to be effective in achieving it or enhancing it.

1. Daily Self Development

DSD helps us to train for improvement in ourselves while helping us cope. It fortifies us from the daily strife we all go through and it builds us to a better future version of ourselves. It is a way of training yourself to grow and develop.

2. Self-Efficacy
One’s sense of self-efficacy can play a major role in how one approaches goals, tasks, and challenges. We build on our self efficacy by taking on challenges and tasks and refining our approach and strategies to be better at the accomplishment of them. Anyone who is skilled at something knows they have to challenge themselves, sometimes it is self driven, sometimes it is finding a coach/mentor, or maybe being in the presence of an expert. Confidence in self comes from a respect we have of ourself and our inner dialogue is immensely influential. Positive self talk, preparation, and a sound approach go a long way in the progression of self-efficacy.

3. Discernment.
The good judgment or wisdom to compare, contrast, and select that which is of optimum good for us and our future state. Resilience is tied with our mental and physical state of well being, those are made of conscious and deliberate choice. There is also the discernment to engage, when not to and when to break off engagement. Not because the challenge is hard but because it is worthy of the effort, time and resources. Working on wisdom is a very challenging undertaking it is a matter of gaining in experiences in an objective way that allows mindful inventory of attributes that resulted in success or failure, good outcomes or poor ones, great subpar and bad performances.

4. Wellness

Your state of health and wellness and how much you invest in keeping it optimize is an important part of resilience. Let’s look at how prisoners are broken down sleep deprived, poor nutrition, little to no exercise, little to no positive social connectedness, little to no positive stimulation. Use what I call the Frank rule of 180 do the opposite of a negative approach.
Prioritize good sleep, fitness, positive social connectedness and other positive stimuli (see also DSD)

5. Caring
Caring is a sincere love of having a positive impact on others which infuses a passion. Having a deep sincere concern for others and how things will work out for them. Having a mission something we are working for that is bigger than ourselves that contributes to others fosters us to give more and to endure more. Caring can allow us to see our mission through because selflessness has far more satisfaction and purpose than selfishness.

6. Toughness.
Toughness is inate in all of us but being too comfortable for too long can diminish it in us.

Toughness is:

– emotional stability especially in the face of disappointment
– a positive Perspective even when facing hard times
– strength under stress, it is the ability to perform as good if not better when the
stakes are higher
– a willingness of Preparation for challenges
– the right positive attitude toward setbacks

I love this Grit Scale

Grit Scale

Take the test and see where you are on it then if you’re not where you want see if you can’t train to improve.

7. Endurance
When we are tired we are vulnerable. Lack of endurance will make us vulnerable like it will make an athlete or an athletic team easier to beat in the latter half of a game. Build your endurance with training and as you do you will find your mental and phsyical mindset endure longer which leads to resiliency.

8. Cognitive maturity

The development of our critical thinking and our emotional IQ are profound in the impact they have on our resilience. Gaining alliances by being in tune with others and socially able gives us opportunities for support. Being more logical rather than emotional can set us to think through a barrier rather than to concede to it.

Overcome barriers by searching for the barriers weaknesses and your strengths. DFL

9. Dedication

The quality of being committed to a task or purpose. Dedication is a conscious decision. It is tied to our belief in what we are doing as well as who is doing it. You will also see greater dedication in those that have a mission/purpose. Knowing that, create a mission for yourself, mine is to help those who want to make a positive change

10. Hope, Belief and Motivation

Hope is not a stand alone strategy but the opposite of hope is hopelessness and with hopelessness comes despair. Have you ever attempted to achieve a goal in a state of despair. No, because these are incongruent and don’t work together So we have to sustain belief, a spirit within us that feeds off of the optimism we create and sustains hope which all compels us to act – they are motivating. We have to sustain hope, belief and motivation doing what it takes to stay positive during difficult times. Motivation isn’t time ill spent, it is an investment that can fuel the arrival or at least ward off exhaustion. Stay in the race until you cross the finish line. Fight until the end of the final round.

11. Achievement

Value Achievements, don’t define who we are by them. If we have a belief in ourselves we won’t faulted in the face of disappointment. Having a sense of self confidence is needed not to be shattered in the event of a failure, a miss or a frustration. That said a drive to achieve goes a long way to fuel our long journey to accomplishment.

12. Peace
We can motivate ourselves by fear to the immediacy of completing a task but long term I advocate seeking peace. I can be at peace yet at a high tempo. We often associated anxiety, fear or anger as states that allow for motivation of action but those have a negative physiological impact and are difficult to sustain without long term harm. Seeking peace with high tempo thoughtful actions will be good for the mission and for your health.

13. Focus.
Not taking our eyes off the target no matter the distress we are under, no matter how long it takes to get there. Many have unrealistic expectations for success and don’t exhaust in getting to it but become frustrated by their own making.

14. Love

If you have a why you can endure any how. Friedrich Nietzsche
Love is the most powerful reason we all have, it far exceeds any negative emotion in its power to sustain us. Love is relentless it can add to or be our Reliance.

Work on your resilience by working in these areas and you will see it is reinforced along with many other positive attributes that can help you stay in the fight longer.

It is not always the one who holds the advantage, is more prepared or is the most skilled, sometimes it is the one who can endure to the end who will succeed over all others. DFL

Put all those attributes together with resilience and you have a force to be reckoned with.

Mental Toughness, resilience, mission can allow you to stay in the game longer and that improves your probability for accomplishing your goals. Set your goals stay focused, be hungry, work diligently with a good strategy and mindset, be discerning and watch for opportunities to leverage your new found resiliency to succeed.

Thank you
DrFrankLayman

“We choose to go to the moon. We choose to go to the moon in this decade and do the other things, not because they are easy, but because they are hard, because that goal will serve to organise and measure the best of our energies and skills, because that challenge is one that we are willing to accept, one we are unwilling to postpone, and one which we intend to win, and the others, too.” JFK

Let me win, but if I cannot win, let me be brave in the attempt. Roman gladiators

I’ve missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I’ve been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed. Michael Jordan

The Joy OF Achievement by DrFrankLayman

I am inclined to say Success is an integral component to being satisfied in yourself and your life. If that tenant is accepted then understanding the component parts of success is important to achieving it.

Happiness lies in the joy of achievement and the thrill of creative effort. Franklin D. Roosevelt

How To Achieve
Your life is a delicate balance if it isn’t, we fall. Success has to be defined, understood, and clearly represented for us to achieve it.
By defining your success, you create a clear target to aim at. The taste of success leaves you wanting more, it gets you thinking positively and moving more fluidly, less inhibited. It has you refining your process to continue to grow and develop and ultimately achieve more.
What are the component parts of success
1) Wellness
Wellness is complex assortment of essential pillars that the rest of everything you do, are, and become rests on. We need to accept that as a paradigm shift in our thinking and use the approach I have set out in other writings and podcasts to achieve it.
2) Mental Toughness
Mental toughness is forged, built and trained, it can be improved in anyone who wants. Many people who have it too easy and don’t know the struggle of hardship don’t build it up. Push to your edge then your edge incrementally moves forward, then keep repeating the process. A better state of wellness also helps us become more mentally tough, it fortifies us steels us up from the hardships we all have to face.
3) Strong Bonds
True sincere relationships, positive social involvement with people we love and care about and who reciprocate those feelings.
4) Financial Freedom
To be financially free means that you have enough money so that you don’t worry about it continually, as most people do. Autonomy from what oppresses us, causing us to have to do something we don’t care for or for someone we don’t respect. Being forced to do something you are unhappy doing to get something that doesn’t result in happiness is not a good long term strategy. Achieving financial freedom is one of the most important goals we can make for ourselves and one of the most important goals to achieve for ourselves.
5) A Mission
If you have a why you can endure any how. Friedrich Nietzsche Having a commitment to something bigger than oneself keeps us in the game where we still have a chance at success. Durability and perseverance are enhanced when we fight for something of meaning.
6) Self-Awareness
To get results and advance you have to be at your best. You cant give your best if you are not at your best. DFL
7) Personal Growth and Development
Stagnant water grows toxic. Like water we need to flow being fluid and progressing carving out our legacy. DFL
8) Perseverance
I love the underdog story, in most of those stories you will see an underlying statement about perseverance. Learn to grow strong in adversity don’t wilt, win. DFL
9) Self efficacy
The belief in yourself comes from accomplishing and achieving. Start with the small and continue to build on your achievements challenging yourself and pushing the limits.
10) Leadership
The power and ability to lead not just others but self. This can be God Given or man made but anyone can enhance their leadership skills with training. The better the training approach and methodology the better the outcomes.
11) Courage to…
Courage is an action.
The courage to take action, The courage to stand up to fear – fear of failure or fear of success and move forward is an integral part of success.
Take Action, set up your goals looking at them through the lens of logical thought, distill them into tasks, distill the tasks to component parts, seek out information and resources that will be needed, then start. Be prepared for barriers, take time to refine and strategically prepare. Don’t lose your motivation, keep the fires burning. Commit to DSD, Don’t neglect your innovation or imagination.
Don’t set limits on the heights you can obtain. Be patient, almost all things take longer than expected and if our expectations are unreasonable or impractical we stand to lose on a winner due to frustration.

Put your heart, mind, and soul into even your smallest acts. This is the secret of success. Swami Sivananda

Success is no accident. It is hard work, perseverance, learning, studying, sacrifice and most of all, love of what you are doing or learning to do. Pele

Success is progressive development of self. DFL
DrFrankLayman
Author

Daily Self Development (DSD) – Approaching Life With The Intent Of Improving It by DrFrankLayman

Daily Self Development (DSD): Approaching Life With The Intent Of Improving It
by DrFrankLayman

Added to any situation, group, or dynamic are you confident you would impress upon it your positive impact. How many of us are living day to day just trying to get by, never mind looking to advance. Most will come to see the enthusiasm of hope worn down by the longevity of process. We all start off assuming there will be more tail winds than head winds in our life, in our relationships, and in our carrier. Those not durable enough to endure will never find their finish line, they will never reach their potential, gain the ground they want and that causes so many so much frustration. Frustration is an emotion that occurs when we are inhibited from reaching a set goal or desired result. When we reach our goals, when we achieve and accomplish something it brings with it self efficacy, confidence, and happiness. Winning environments can be trained that is why there are dynasties in sports. In ourselves result oriented mindsets can be formulated, we can train ourselves to be mentally strong, rational and effective.
Frustration is what causes us to give in, give up, compromise, or lose interest. Typical response to frustration are anger, quitting (burn out or giving up), loss of self-esteem and self-confidence, stress, sadness and depression declined self efficacy. Frustration results in a hindrance to all the things that are in opposition to what resulted from it i.e. enthusiasm, joy, satisfaction, peace, happiness and self confidence.

Frustration is looking past this moment you have to a future moment you want. DFL

There are times I have noticed that the goal or desired outcome made are sound but the time frame is unrealistic. The skill set pocessed has not been acquired, in short, preparations haven’t fully been made.

What can be done to improve results, meet goals, and gain positive outcomes (desired endings)? We can start by self development, I can make many arguments why this approach has mutli-variant positive impacts in our lives. The goal of life should be success. I define success as the progressive development of self. We all don’t start with the same advantages, talents, or opportunities but we all start with the desire to grow and develop to be and do more. So define success as you will but for me it is in self development and that is one of the reasons I advocate Daily Self Development (DSD). Thinking you will just advance without working for it is like an athlete thinking they are going to the big show without training just hoping and dreaming it will happen. We need to do the same train everyday for a better future. I also believe that daily self development if done with the correct focus can help steel us up, fortify our will and mental toughness along with our physical and mental endurance. Without a doubt commitment to true change, a paradigm shift is what I am advocating. Habit, rigid scheduling, and routine are good short term approaches but what I am advocating goes far beyond that, it goes to a new perspective. Long term we will internally rebel against a rigid structure but it can help with the transition until we have accepted a new way of thinking about ourselves. I might regress but that isn’t me, I am not going to dismiss myself or demean myself but know that my true self will reemerged another day. I will have more training days than missed days and over time a compounding effect will get me to a better future me and one who is far more prepared to go the distance and weather the bad storms and become who I am meant to be.

Fulfillment and disappointment are close neighbors ensure you have the correct approach to get to the destination you desire to arrive at. DFL

There is no struggle big enough to crush my spirit. DFL

Live in today while preparing for tomorrow. DFL

Forgive your past, engage in your present, and prepare for your future. DFL

Get started today by reading my books and blogs, listening to my podcasts and by thinking, being, behaving, and acting in a positive way. Make the shift of mindset and commit and train daily.

I wish yall the Very Best!!!

DrFrankLayman

Fundamentals of Professionalism: How Being More Professional Can Enhance Your Carrier and Your Happiness. By DrFrankLayman

Fundamentals of Professionalism: How Being More Professional Can Enhance Your Carrier and Your Happiness. By DrFrankLayman

Professionalism is defined as the skill, good judgment, and polite behavior that is expected from a person who is trained to do a job well. You don’t have to be a doctor, lawyer or other professional to act with professionalism. I would advocate that assuming the disposition of a true professional, engaging in your work with professionalism, will enhance your career and your happiness in that chosen vocation. Whatever your position, even if it is transient (that you don’t plan to hold it for long in the pursuit of something more), or if it is an entry level you are occupying by assuming your position with the posture of professionalism you will be more effective, happier, and better set for growth and development.
For many waiting tables is a transient occupation, yet there are some who have elevated it to a profession they are trained, skilled, and not easily replaced. Just look on LinkedIn you will see titles like Professional Wait Staff / Assistant Sommelier. Check out any 5 star rated restaurant and you will notice that the atmosphere is different, not just due to what is being served or the physical structure it is held in but it has someone within it who understands why professionalism is essential to enhancing the experience of those being served even in what many consider to be a menial position.

So never lose an opportunity of urging a practical beginning, however small, for it is wonderful how often in such matters the mustard-seed germinates and roots itself. Florence Nightingale

Being more professional, aiming to think believe and behave in a positive and effective manner – The conduct, intentions, qualities that characterize a professional are performance enhancers. Display these qualities in any position and you will be more effective and that improves your chances of greater/more opportunities. That as an objective target of self is only going to increase your effectiveness no matter what you are doing now or training to be.
I started thinking, acting, behaving, and learning my profession long before I entered it because professional domineer extends beyond on vocation to any chosen career avenue I decide to participate in. Part of professionalism is training in skills that distinguish you from others doing the same work. That requires the leadership of self to work and strive for more. The best leadership development begins with comprehensive self development.DFL
Being professional doesn’t imply being formal. Some will use formal behavior as a barrier to exclude themselves from others, to lord over and distinguish themselves as superior. This is not what it means to be a professional or the intent of professionalism. A professional is skilled and those truly skilled are effective. Seek results not façade or flare. Don’t exclude others include them, that allows you to cast a larger net to help more people as true professionalism requires a selfless mission aimed at contributing, helping, and being a blessing to others.
A great person like a great river will not refuse the smallest contributories. DFL
If you judge yourself above others what kind of perspective will you have for those you want to help?
Selfless missions contribute to happiness. Don’t underestimate the value of a life dedicated to a virtuous/selfless mission. DFL
Be the professional you want to become and you will be all the more closer to obtaining it and all that comes with it.DFL
Understanding skill and knowledge are transferable attributes that will follow you as you grow and develop in your career and as a person. DFL
From the lowest of positions to the highest station we should adhere to being true leaders and professionals. Not choosing what is easiest but challenging ourselves with that worth doing, thinking, being, and acting in and always for it is for the good as true professionalism demands.

Thank you
DrFrankLayman
Author of Success Through Logical Thinking
Reflections To Success
Daily Reflective Growth
Contemplative Growth and Development

Thank The Passer: Not Just A Gesture For Basketball But One For Business By DrFrankLayman

Thank The Passer: Not Just A Gesture For Basketball But One For Business
DrFrankLayman

Thank the passer by taking an eighth of a second to point-to-the-passer and acknowledge their selflessness. This quick and simple gesture is an action that promotes team unity.

The Origins of the acknowledgement

In the 60’s and 70’s a conversation between Dean Smith and John Wooden initiated a basketball tradition of generosity and unselfishness. The goal was simple to initiate an overt gesture to build team unity by acknowledgement. Coach Dean Smith asked players on the UNC men’s basketball teams to recognize the unselfish act of a teammate’s pass to them.

It became a team rule. In practices, games, and other Tar Heel basketball activities, the man who scored had to point-to-the-passer.

Dean Smith was a great leader who mentored others to be great leaders and this acknowledgement he built into a habitual exhibit of appreciation demonstrates his brilliance as a mentor, coach, and leader. Not acknowledging others that have helped us and participated in our success is greedy, selfish, entitled, and demonstrates the weakness of self doubt.

True leaders want to recognize everyone who contribute and do it in a fair and consistent way.DFL

This gesture in basketball is linear it acknowledges the last pass that lead to scoring while in business it isn’t as easy and we have to be mindful confident and fair enough to take the time to acknowledge other contributors.

The absence of acknowledgement is neglect and to neglect someone is a slight – it is disrespectful and leads away from a good relationship, not toward it.

I want those in my charge to feel fairly rewarded with acknowledgement and I want each one of them to be aggressively recognizing those who made a considerable contribution above, below, and across their station.

This is all based on honesty, fairness, and mindfulness realizing that acknowledgements, compliments, and recognition are earned they are not just given away. If they aren’t earned or truly challenging enough to warrant they will have no meaning or impact to motivate future great work, thought, or action.

I do believe in praising that which deserves to be praised. Dean Smith

If I have seen further than others, it is by standing upon the shoulders of giants. Isaac Newton

Take your yourself and those in your sphere of influence further by being generous and positive and freely communicating it and showing it. Take the risk and be brave enough to so you care.

I worry that business leaders are more interested in material gain than they are in having the patience to build up a strong organization, and a strong organization starts with caring for their people. John Wooden

Thank you

DrFrankLayman

How To Improve Performance: Innovating A Highly Skilled Team By DrFrankLayman

How To Improve Performance: Innovating A Highly Skilled Team
By DrFrankLayman

Value the team and their work. Have a sincere appreciation and express it openly.

Corporate culture matters, so ensure you are creating it. You should model it and purvey it. It should be facilitative, safe, and innovative. It should be a culture of leaders. How leadership chooses to value its people impacts effectiveness and innovation. DFL
When you do this is shows you believe in them and that is very powerful to innovation and performance.

My father gave me the greatest gift anyone could give another person, he believed in me. Jim Valvano

Don’t micromanage rather facilitate, support, and promote. Micromanagement and monotony stifle creativity and happiness in teams which are keys to results and productivity.

Don’t stifle creativity with control, have self realizing stops and thoughtful oversight.

Provide resources to build and encourage cooperation over competition. Long term happiness studies show this is a far better longevity approach.

Don’t neglect training even if it isn’t directly to support innovation, being trained in other areas there is a transposition that can lead to more creativity performance and personal satisfaction. Find innovative speakers and lecturers to expose yourself and team to.

Promote wellness
Be physically active as a group and promote team building activities.
True Health & Wellness cannot be separated into mental and physical, it is bound one part reliant on the other to be whole. DFL

Insert healthy humor into the environment, healthy humor is not aggressive humor – sarcasm, teasing,critical or ridicule. To be effective it should be self enhancing or affiliative.

Teach and encourage mindfulness.
Live your life each day as you would climb a mountain. An occasional glance towards the summit keeps the goal in mind, but many beautiful scenes are to be observed from each new vintage point. Harold B Melchart

Provide them resources to build their self efficacy, leadership, business acumen, and happines.

Make the environment safe by being honest and transparent allowing them that opportunity. Avoiding deceit and excuses allows trust to build and more trustworthy environments tend to be more creative.

Reward thoughtful courage
More often in life, we end up regretting the chances in life that we had, but didn’t take them, than those chances that we took and wished we hadn’t. Anonymous

Don’t set an environment where excuses are needed as a coping mechanism. That said, once your environment is set properly don’t let the team tolerate excuses.

An excuse is worse and more terrible than a lie, for an excuse is a
lie guarded. Pope John Paul I
Build their resilience. Don’t wish it were easier, wish you were better. Don’t wish for fewer problems, wish for more skills. Don’t wish for less challenges, wish for more wisdom. Earl Shoaf

Set goals but be flexible to see the opportunities that come from attempts that miss.
The tragedy of life doesn’t lie in not reaching your goal. The tragedy lies in having no goals to reach. Benjamin Mays

Be generous, generous people are confident they know they can achieve more and that they are above recognition the gratification isn’t needed.

Develop and encourage character building and professionalism

Look for opportunities to emphasize inclusivity.
A great person like a great river does not refuse even the smallest contributory. DFL

Don’t exert control exemplify positive influence.

Set time aside for oblique thinking activities strategic planning and creative positive personal interactions. Team building activity and esprit de corps.

Once the culture of leadership and creativity is formed allow it to reinvent itself always encouraging results and performance.
Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life’s about creating yourself. George Bernard Shaw

Promote, instill, teach and develop leadership.

The Eight Pillars of Leadership model

Trustworthy: Encourage honesty and sincerity in all and demand it in yourself.

Selfless: True leadership has and always will be set on the principal of selflessness.

Relational: Critical thinking should be fostered and developed to allow predominance and avoidance of ETTS.

Inspirational & Motivational:Cultivate a team mindset for excellence and innovation. Be enthusiastic and optimistic. Encourage thoughtful risk-taking. Create the environment and set the stage of enthusiasm, encouragement trust and performance. Prompt positive thoughts behaviors and actions while demonstrating them.

Supportive: Protect your people from political minefields. Secure needed resources and facilitate creativity to extract performance . Give feedback, do not assign blame.

Mission Driven:Have a shared team mission and encourage and assist those in your charge to find their own.

Responsible: Take responsibility as a leader. Model ethical action. Strive for balance.

Efforts and courage are not enough without purpose and direction.
John F Kennedy

The purpose of life is to be happy by being useful, effective, and honorable – To have provided a legacy by making a difference to humanity. DFL

If you believe that what you do matters ultima.tely it does.

They are able who think they are able. Virgil

Lead those around you to develop themselves outside the team. Self reliance is a fundamental key to improving group dynamics and performance. Encourage individual and grow with daily self development ( see my blog, listen to my podcast and read my book for further insight)

Leadership is an action not a position. DFL

Creating a supportive, motivating, encouraging culture for people to live in, allows greater opportunity to thrive, perform, and succeed. Positive cultures foster positive people and positive results.

The decay of imagination is the death of creativity. DFL

Our problems are man-made, therefore they may be solved by man. And man can be as big as he wants. No problem of human destiny is beyond human beings. John F. Kennedy

Thank you
DrFrankLayman
Author of: Contemplative Growth and Development; Daily Reflective Growth;
Reflections To Success; Success Through Logical Thinking

The Pillars of Daily Self Development By DrFrankLayman

The Pillars of Daily Self Development by DrFrankLayman

My approach to daily self development, isn’t a forced or a habitual routine (monotony diminishes innovation and happiness), it is a paradigm shift. You will want to work on these encourage and motivate yourself everyday and forgive yourself if you can’t get to all of them. You will slowly find more time and become more efficient in your approach. Work on yourself everyday and as you grow and develop your self confidence and self efficacy will benefit as will your durability and effectiveness. Achievement in the small leads to achievement in the grand. Between the intervals of the must do’s of life therein lies the opportunity to achieve and advance.

You can remain idle hoping or you can be active achieving. DFL

There is something about achievement success and action that are intimately tied.

The cornerstones on which we will set our foundation are:

Sincerity, truth and ethics

Love and kindness

Wisdom, understanding and peace

Durability and legacy

From a strong foundation we will build strong pillars that will support a taller structure placing one story atop another we will rise elevating ourselves to new heights.

There is something about achievement success and action that are intimately tied.
Intellect- pursuing things of more complex forms and fields of knowledge. Engage your mind, not being passive and accepting of the information streaming at you. You need to plan and pursue those things that are meaningful and will get you where you want to be in your life and that takes seeking, studying and referencing for understanding and assimilation.

Emotional – a state of consciousness based on feelings of joy, sorrow, fear, hate, or the like that circumvents rational thinking. Think of those difficult people you have encountered, the ones who have difficulty adjusting, who act out and how it influences their relationships. There are ways to improve your emotional intelligence and I urge you to seek them out. It is a topic I have written about and been invited to speak about to some significant companies. Its impact is well documented and it is relevant to individuals, teams and companies.

Spiritual – of or relating to the spirit as the seat of the moral or religious nature. I am a Christian but I am not just speaking to Christian spirituality here. It is the peace found in faith and belief of that which is ethereal. Think about the person who overcomes hardship and with grace and confidence meets adversity knowing they will overcome and therefore they have peace during all of life’s upheavals.

Social – seeking or enjoying the companionship of others; friendly; sociable; gregarious and one who is sought by others for those characteristics. Watch and observe actively seek ways to improve your ability to engage people in a meaningful way and sustain their relationships.

Leadership – the ability to guiding directing developing and influencing others. If everything is sales everything else is leadership when considering the vestige of success.

Entrepreneurship – being industrious enough to organize and manage any enterprise with skill usually with considerable initiative and risk. If you build a life take the initiative to build your own not someone else’s.

Expertise – the matter that is subject to some action and is performed with above average skill. Whatever your vocation or that which you want to be your vocation must be overcome by judicious study and deliberate exposure to gain insight and experience. Work to be the best at your craft by mindful study and acquisition of experience.

Health and Wellness – the progressive and unceasing pursuit of an improved state of internal being. This is comprehensive to physical and mental health. Fitness due to is powerful influence over health and wellness is a strong subset of this category. Nutrition and proper supplementation cannot be separated due to the strong physiological influences it has. It is not only about what we do to improve in this area but what we constrain ourselves from doing. Physical fitness

Mission/Purpose – an important task duty goal or calling that is interlaced with a strong conviction. Purpose the reason for which we exist. Given a reason I can sustain the journey no matter its length or difficulty to ensure I arrive at my desired destination.

Financial is not listed, however, improving yourself in the above areas, should translate to a healthier and more prudent relationship with money. We will leave this topic for another discussion as it is complex and requires more time to explore.

Remember the refuge of a sound mind can protect us from any foe, wrong, insult, or trauma. Given the recognition of these areas of development we now need to have an action plan to grow and develop in them. Growth and development should yield improvement that gains us more of what we seek in life.

Working on these daily will create a compounding effect that allows the you of tomorrow a better probability of success. They are also coping mechanism and can help you whether the storms of tomorrow.

Peace is reached by being active in what brings you joy and purpose and that develops your intellect, health and mission.DFL

The ultimate human endeavors is to find and retain happiness. Working on yourself so you can selflessly serve others brings great happiness. Happiness achieved can be gifted to others.

To have Happiness you must define it, seek it, express it, and share it. DFL

Thank you
DrFrankLayman
Author of: Contemplative Growth and Development; Daily Reflective Growth;
Reflections To Success; Success Through Logical Thinking

Transition Embraced: Searching For Opportunitiy In Challenge by DrFrankLayman

Transition Embraced: Searching For Opportunitiy In Challenge by DrFrankLayman

Transition feared is abysmal
Transition anticipated is infinite
DFL

Given the proper mentor and perspective transition is an opportunity for growth, achievement and success DFL

I chose to define Transition in terms of development evolution passage progress
Metamorphosis transformation.

Many fear it because transition Is difficult – growth always is.

Recently I Lectured on Positive Transition To Military personnel transitioning to the Civilian Workforce
I challenged them to think differently about the U know they face ahead of them
To see transition as a challenge and acknowledge that Challenges to allow for growth and opportunity
To go out with enthusiasm a plan and an adaptable mindset.
Not to just accept the conventional transition of getting a job but to consider transforming into and entrepreneur.
Not to accept the conventional definition of an entrepreneur but to consider my definition

Entrepreneur
One who finds a way to get compensated for their passion and happiness.

Then consider a team behind their endeavor, one that has the experience and tools to increase the probability of success.

I hated every minute of training, but I said, ‘Don’t quit. Suffer now and live the rest of your life as a champion.’ Muhammad Ali

We have to be realistic and understand transition takes time but I have the benefit of having gone through some tuff transitions and I have discovered

Small steps in my journeys have lead me to extraordinary places. DFL

Remember you have to include yourself, don’t wilt or retreat during this process

If you see the world as them and me you’ll always be excluded if you see it as us you’ll always be included DFl

That said we must dream and work.

Your not who you were which allows you to be something more DFL

My humanity is incessant self overcoming. Friedrich Nietzsche

No matter the transition you face now or in your future prepare yourself daily because they are coming and they don’t stop it’s like standing at the shore and meeting the waves you have to be ready to face the relentless surf with mindful intent and you will either struggle against it or learn to play in it – that is a choice

Don’t let your ego isolate you from the people and organizations that can help you. Out of pride we sometimes make the wrong decision not to seek help.
I want you to be self reliant but also capable of networking and reaching out to others. It is a complex tight rope to walk but becoming skill can make the difference of falling or moving forward.

Finally don’t let anyone pigeon hole you look at the opportunities and be confident your skills can be transposed.
Don’t let the critics dictate your dreams.
Many dreams are symbolic and at the same time real because reality is shaped by belief and perception DFL

Thank you
DrFrankLayman
Author of: Contemplative Growth and Development; Daily Reflective Growth;
Reflections To Success; Success Through Logical Thinking

Leadership Styles: Individualize Your Approach To Maximize Effectiveness By DrFrankLayman

Leadership Styles: Individualize Your Approach To Maximize Effectiveness By DrFrankLayman

 

While speaking at Hire Heroes the topic focused on leadership and professionalism in one of the following tracks – career, business leadership, entrepreneur. During my lecture, given the constraints of time, I could only discuss a few of the many leadership styles. One of the participants asked for an expounding of the topic and that was the motivation for this blog.

Leadership style refers to characteristics and behaviors exhibited when leading a team. Leadership style can influence performance and we should all strive to be the best leader we can so we can be as effective as we can. Great leaders can create great change, motivate performance, enhance creativity and innovation in others.

Early leadership style research

Leadership styles were first more formally defined in the late 1930s by a group of psychologists, the leader was Kurt Lewin.

If you want to truly understand something, try to change it. Kurt Lewin

His team studied youth leaders in activity groups and examined behaviors and discerned three leadership styles.

The autocratic style is one in which a single person takes control and makes decisions, directing others in his or her chosen course of action. Lewin’s team found that this was the most unsatisfactory leadership style with the youth groups.
In a democratic leadership style, one person takes control but is open to group input, often allowing the group to make decisions and collectively assign tasks. This leader guides rather than directs. This was the most popular leadership style in the youth groups and garnered the greatest positive response.
With the laissez-faire approach, the person in charge stepped back and did nothing. He or she provided no direction or guidance. The group was disorganized and unproductive.
Their research supports the idea that people aren’t just born leaders but can be trained to be leaders. They also recognized the influence that the team members had on a person’s leadership style. This is important and explains why some people are effective in some situations and not others as leaders.

In the 1970s, Paul Hersey and Ken Blanchard introduced the concept of situational leadership meaning that a leader adapts his or her style to the situation. Situational leadership refers to when the leader of an organization adjusts his style to fit the developmental level of the team he is attempting to influence.

Leadership approaches can be influenced by the strength and personalities of the team. A strong team may require little or no guidance, yet another team may require more guidance and support.

Overtime other styles have been identified and written about.

Bureaucratic leadership, whose leaders focus on following every rule. The extreme of this is an agent see Milgram’s work on obedience
Charismatic leadership, in which leaders inspire enthusiasm in their teams and are energetic in motivating others to move forward. The extreme the only advance their selfish interests
Task-oriented leadership, whose leaders focus only on getting the job done. Results based leadership is good and can be folded into other styles
People-driven leadership, in which leaders are tuned into organizing, supporting and developing people on their teams.
Transformational leadership, whose leaders inspire by expecting the best from everyone and themselves.
Servant leadership was developed by Robert K. Greenleaf in 1970. The servant leader serves the people he/she leads, which implies that employees are an end in themselves rather than a means to an organizational purpose or bottom line.

Modern leadership characteristics:

Cognitive maturity
Empathy
Trustworthy
Decisive
Sincere
Aware
Focus
Accountability
Confidence
Optimismtic
Honest
Inspiraing
Motivating
Skilled
Professional
Ethical

Modern Leadership Perspectives
Daniel Goleman discusses six leadership styles, which he argues spring from different components of emotional intelligence:

Commanding: Leaders demand compliance.
Visionary: Leaders mobilize people toward a vision.
Affiliative: Leaders create emotional bonds to their team.
Democratic: Leaders build consensus through participation and interaction.
Pacesetting: Leaders expect excellence and self-direction from team members.
Coaching: Leaders develop people for the future and team member’s future.
The Transformational Leadership Style
Transformational leadership is often identified as the single most effective style. This style was first described during the late 1970s and later expanded upon by researcher Bernard M. Bass. Some of the key characteristics of his style of leadership are the abilities to motivate and inspire followers and to direct positive changes in groups.

Transformational leaders tend to be emotionally intelligent, energetic, and passionate. They are not only committed to helping the organization achieve its goals, but also to helping group members fulfill their potential.

There exists evidence of its effectiveness in promoting well being in the team and a higher performance and improved group satisfaction than other leadership styles tested.

The Transactional Leadership Style
Transactional leadership views the leader-follower relationship as a transaction. By accepting a position as a member of the group, the individual has agreed to obey the leader. In most situations, this involves the employer-employee relationship, and the transaction focuses on the follower completing required tasks in exchanged for monetary compensation.
One of the main advantages of this leadership style is that it creates clearly defined roles. People know what they are required to do and what they will be receiving in exchange for completing these tasks. It also allows leaders to offer a great deal of supervision and direction if it is needed. Team members may also be motivated to perform well to receive rewards. One of the biggest downsides is that the transactional style tends to stifle creativity and limits opportunity for a true win-win situation to develop.

The Situational Leadership Styles
The Situational Leadership style the leaders stress the significant influence of the environment and the situation on leadership.

The situational theory of leadership suggests that no single leadership style is most effective. Instead, it depends on the situation at hand and which type of leadership and strategies are best-suited to the task. According to the theory, the most effective leaders are those that are able to adapt their style to the situation and look at cues such as the type of task, the nature of the group, and other factors that might contribute to getting the job done.

They also

Maintain an acute awareness of their innate leadership-related strengths and areas for development – critical skill sets in working in high-performing organizations
Conduct highly effective coaching conversations by understanding when a particular leadership style has a high probability of success and when it does not
Skillfully influence up, down and across the organization by knowing when to be “consistent” and when to be “flexible”
Create more productive teams/organizations by accelerating the development of individuals that are new to their role and/or are learning a new task
Develop engaged, committed employees by effectively recognizing and proactively addressing the dynamics of performance regression
Effectively drive behavior change and business results by communicating through a common, practical language of leadership
Situational leadership theory is often referred to as the Hersey-Blanchard Situational Leadership Theory.
Hershey and Blanchard’s Leadership Styles

Hershey and Blanchard suggested that there are four primary leadership styles:

Telling (S1): This style involves the leader telling people what to do and how to do it.
Selling (S2): This style involves more back-and-forth between leaders and followers. Leaders “sell” their ideas and message to get group members to buy into the process.
Participating (S3): In this approach, the leaders offers less direction and allows members of the group to take a more active role in coming up with ideas and making decisions.
Delegating (S4): This style is characterized by a less involved, hands-off approach to leadership. Group members tend to make most of the decisions and take most of the responsibility for what happens.
Leadership and Maturity Levels
So how exactly do leaders and managers determine which style of leadership to use? The right style depends a lot on the maturity level (i.e. the level of knowledge and competence) of the individuals or group.

Hershey and Blanchard’s theory identifies four different levels of maturity

M1: Group members lack the knowledge, skills, and willingness to complete the task.
M2: Group members are willing and enthusiastic, but lack the ability.
M3: Group members have the skills and capability to complete the task, but are unwilling to take responsibility.
M4: Group members are highly skilled and willing to complete the task.
The Hershey-Blanchard model suggests that the following leadership styles are the most appropriate for these maturity levels:

Low Maturity (M1) – Telling (S1)
Medium Maturity (M2) – Selling (S2)
Medium Maturity (M3) – Participating (S3)
High Maturity (M4) – Delegating (S4)
The SLII Model
The Situational Leadership II (or SLII model) was developed by Kenneth Blanchard and builds on Blanchard and Hershey’s original theory. According to the revised version of the theory, effective leaders must base their behavior on the developmental level of group members for specific tasks. The developmental level is determined by each individual’s level of competence and commitment.

Enthusiastic Beginner (D1): High commitment, low competence.
Disillusioned Learner (D2): Some competence, but setbacks have led to low commitment.
Capable but Cautious Performer (D3):Competence is growing, but level of commitment varies.
Self-Reliant Achiever (D4): High competence and commitment.
SLII also suggests that effective leadership is dependent upon two key behaviors: supporting and directing. Directing behaviors include giving specific directions and instructions and attempting to control the behavior of group members. Supporting behaviors include actions such as encouraging subordinates, listening, and offering recognition and feedback.

The theory identifies four basic leadership styles.

Directing (S1): High on directing behaviors, low on supporting behaviors.
Coaching (S2): High on both directing and supporting behaviors.
Supporting (S3): Low on directing behavior and high on supporting behaviors.
Delegating (S4): Low on both directing and supporting behaviors.
The main point of SLII theory is that not one of these four leadership styles is best. Instead, an effective leader will match his or her behavior to the developmental skill of each team member for the task at hand.

Purpose Driven Leader

“The purpose of life is to contribute in some way to making things better.” – Robert F. Kennedy
Purpose-driven serve the purpose (the “something bigger”) the reason the organization exist. d
Decisions are made and actions are taken based on the purpose.. In other words, effective leaders align themselves with the purpose by doing this leaders run the avoid the risk of falling victim to pursuit of selfish interests and greed.

Man’s Search For Meaning Victor Frankl
Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of human freedoms – to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way. Viktor E. Frankl
He who has a why to live can bear almost any how. Friedrich Nietzsche

Meaning takes place in progressively larger goals rooted in deeply held beliefs.
I believe the most important attribute for a leader is being principle-centered. Centering on principles that are universal and timeless provides a foundation and compass to guide every decision and every act. I’ve based my life’s work on promoting principles and teaching the power that resides in principle-centered leadership. Principles are not my invention; they are self-evident and are found throughout the world. If you look at all enduring philosophies, religions and thoughts, you will find principles such as integrity, compassion, trust, honesty, accountability and others at their core. I simply translated these principles into a framework of habits, which when followed with consistency and frequency transforms one’s character and allows one to earn the moral authority necessary for enduring leaderStephen Cove

Leader’s should pause to keep Integrity, Humility, and Generosity ever present in their encounters, approaches, and decisions.

Trust Based Leadership Style
This is a style I am advocating. It comes from the work of my friend Dr. Aneil Mishra and his wife Dr. Karen Mishra from their work Trust Is Everything and Becoming A Trustworthy Leader.

Trust based leaders are the ROCC to creating a trust based culture

Reliable

Open

Competent

Compassionate

Leaders create organizational climates in which people trust leaders, leaders trust their people, people trust each other and people trust themselves to use their judgement, make choices and act within the corporate intent. Trust advances productivity, innovation, and engagement in the team as it advances satisfaction and results.

What’s Your Learning Style?
As you can see, there are different ways to conceive of leadership styles. The leader’s personality and the teams’ personality also contribute to effectiveness and performance.

http://www.tuw.edu/business/leadership-style-quiz/

http://www.keirsey.com/default.aspx

http://www.seemypersonality.com/#q1

 

There are many leadership styles to utilizes. Personally my advice is to learn them and then learn your team. Know their heart and goals so that you can individualize your approach and maximize your effectiveness as a leader.

Your Leadership paradigm needs to be a part of your true inner self displayed in a way that it can be received without translation. DFL

The purer your Leadership is of sincerity, transparency, and truth the purer it will be received and responded to. DFL

 

Please also see my Blog Legacy of Leadership and considering investing in my Book

Success Through Logical Thinking

 

Thank you
DrFrankLayman
Author of: Contemplative Growth and Development; Daily Reflective Growth;
Reflections To Success; Success Through Logical Thinking

#STLTmindset