Conflict Resolution By DrFrankLayman Part 2of2

Conflict Resolution By DrFrankLayman Part 2of2

There are times where conflict is forced upon a good person and in those cases we must be willing to stand up for what is right.

Great spirits have often encountered violent opposition from weak minds. Albert Einstein
I seek and value harmony, so sometimes I must fight for it. DFL

We discussed in part 1 how to address those challenges, in this section lets discuss the integrity of not being the opposition. Let’s work to be the positive force, one that works for consensus. Someone who builds an accord and is a positive force that tries to lift others up. Let’s be that someone who facilitate others to a better outcome, and enhances every environment to create effectiveness in harmony.
Prior to getting to an escalated level of conflict what can we do to prepare for and/or avoid engaging in them?
Let’s look at the states opposite conflict.
Antonyms for conflict
• peace
• agreement
• calm
• harmony
• concord
• stability

We want to occupy the ground that is as far from conflict as we can. The closer we get to the attributes of conflict the greater the risk we expose ourselves and others to it.
Synonyms for conflict
Clash
combat
Competition
Rivalry
Strife
Struggle
Contention

These positions lead to aggressiveness toward one another and can lead to a desire to undermine, exploit, frustrate, and malign. Maligning others by spreading discord or gossip is very detrimental to and in full opposition with creating accord. It is base and exhibits negative emotions those that not only hurt others but that are destructive to the one who posses them.
Peace is not absence of conflict; it is the ability to handle conflict by peaceful means. Ronald Reagan
We aren’t always going to be happy with people but we have to develop ourselves and be adjusted enough to be prepared for undesirable responses, actions and behaviors from others. I advocate daily self development as we are in a constant state of growth unless we actively inhibit it. Training daily advances our effectiveness and it steels us up, it fortifies our resolve and mental toughness.
It is our duty as men and women to proceed as though the limits of our abilities do not exist. Pierre Teilhard de Chardin

We can develop our cognitive maturity, leadership skills, coping mechanisms, and our intellect to gain greater capability to avoid or resolve conflict.

I believe it is far better to be a person of integrity, honesty, and transparency. I believe in virtue for virtue sake. Life isn’t a game we play alone and there are a lot of people who are malicious and want to cause discord. So we must reach for our peace internally and then share it. Let our peace and harmony diffuse throughout the space or company we occupy.

Pre-conflict preparation then is creating an inner state that spills over to our outer state creating a sphere that engulfs others into the realm of positive.
That internal space is in opposition to conflict:
• peace
• truce
• agreement
• calm
• harmony
• surrender
• accord
• concord
• stability
• kindness
• trust

Man must evolve for all human conflict a method which rejects revenge, aggression and retaliation. The foundation of such a method is love. Martin Luther King, Jr.

If you want to bring an end to long-standing conflict, you have to be prepared to compromise. Aung San Suu Kyi

Our relationships are a shared path, remember the Cs every relationship needs to stay on track: Caring Cooperation Communication.

Conflict cannot survive without your participation. Wayne Dyer

Don’t give into pettiness and jealousies be strong in integrity and work to build bridges not fences. DFL

I would also advise reading my other blogs related to advancing relationships
Top 9 Principals to Successful Communication: Developing Sincere Relationships by Dr.FrankLayman

Top 9 Principals to Successful Communication: Developing Sincere Relationships by Dr.FrankLayman

Please visit my author page on Amazon and secure some of my books on self help.

https://t.co/YYJ6f5VHuq
https://t.co/xXsU26a0om

Thank You
DrFrankLayman
Author of: Contemplative Growth and Development; Daily Reflective Growth;
Reflections To Success; Exito A Traves Del Pensamiento Logico; Success Through Logical Thinking

The Joy OF Achievement by DrFrankLayman

I am inclined to say Success is an integral component to being satisfied in yourself and your life. If that tenant is accepted then understanding the component parts of success is important to achieving it.

Happiness lies in the joy of achievement and the thrill of creative effort. Franklin D. Roosevelt

How To Achieve
Your life is a delicate balance if it isn’t, we fall. Success has to be defined, understood, and clearly represented for us to achieve it.
By defining your success, you create a clear target to aim at. The taste of success leaves you wanting more, it gets you thinking positively and moving more fluidly, less inhibited. It has you refining your process to continue to grow and develop and ultimately achieve more.
What are the component parts of success
1) Wellness
Wellness is complex assortment of essential pillars that the rest of everything you do, are, and become rests on. We need to accept that as a paradigm shift in our thinking and use the approach I have set out in other writings and podcasts to achieve it.
2) Mental Toughness
Mental toughness is forged, built and trained, it can be improved in anyone who wants. Many people who have it too easy and don’t know the struggle of hardship don’t build it up. Push to your edge then your edge incrementally moves forward, then keep repeating the process. A better state of wellness also helps us become more mentally tough, it fortifies us steels us up from the hardships we all have to face.
3) Strong Bonds
True sincere relationships, positive social involvement with people we love and care about and who reciprocate those feelings.
4) Financial Freedom
To be financially free means that you have enough money so that you don’t worry about it continually, as most people do. Autonomy from what oppresses us, causing us to have to do something we don’t care for or for someone we don’t respect. Being forced to do something you are unhappy doing to get something that doesn’t result in happiness is not a good long term strategy. Achieving financial freedom is one of the most important goals we can make for ourselves and one of the most important goals to achieve for ourselves.
5) A Mission
If you have a why you can endure any how. Friedrich Nietzsche Having a commitment to something bigger than oneself keeps us in the game where we still have a chance at success. Durability and perseverance are enhanced when we fight for something of meaning.
6) Self-Awareness
To get results and advance you have to be at your best. You cant give your best if you are not at your best. DFL
7) Personal Growth and Development
Stagnant water grows toxic. Like water we need to flow being fluid and progressing carving out our legacy. DFL
8) Perseverance
I love the underdog story, in most of those stories you will see an underlying statement about perseverance. Learn to grow strong in adversity don’t wilt, win. DFL
9) Self efficacy
The belief in yourself comes from accomplishing and achieving. Start with the small and continue to build on your achievements challenging yourself and pushing the limits.
10) Leadership
The power and ability to lead not just others but self. This can be God Given or man made but anyone can enhance their leadership skills with training. The better the training approach and methodology the better the outcomes.
11) Courage to…
Courage is an action.
The courage to take action, The courage to stand up to fear – fear of failure or fear of success and move forward is an integral part of success.
Take Action, set up your goals looking at them through the lens of logical thought, distill them into tasks, distill the tasks to component parts, seek out information and resources that will be needed, then start. Be prepared for barriers, take time to refine and strategically prepare. Don’t lose your motivation, keep the fires burning. Commit to DSD, Don’t neglect your innovation or imagination.
Don’t set limits on the heights you can obtain. Be patient, almost all things take longer than expected and if our expectations are unreasonable or impractical we stand to lose on a winner due to frustration.

Put your heart, mind, and soul into even your smallest acts. This is the secret of success. Swami Sivananda

Success is no accident. It is hard work, perseverance, learning, studying, sacrifice and most of all, love of what you are doing or learning to do. Pele

Success is progressive development of self. DFL
DrFrankLayman
Author

Thank The Passer: Not Just A Gesture For Basketball But One For Business By DrFrankLayman

Thank The Passer: Not Just A Gesture For Basketball But One For Business
DrFrankLayman

Thank the passer by taking an eighth of a second to point-to-the-passer and acknowledge their selflessness. This quick and simple gesture is an action that promotes team unity.

The Origins of the acknowledgement

In the 60’s and 70’s a conversation between Dean Smith and John Wooden initiated a basketball tradition of generosity and unselfishness. The goal was simple to initiate an overt gesture to build team unity by acknowledgement. Coach Dean Smith asked players on the UNC men’s basketball teams to recognize the unselfish act of a teammate’s pass to them.

It became a team rule. In practices, games, and other Tar Heel basketball activities, the man who scored had to point-to-the-passer.

Dean Smith was a great leader who mentored others to be great leaders and this acknowledgement he built into a habitual exhibit of appreciation demonstrates his brilliance as a mentor, coach, and leader. Not acknowledging others that have helped us and participated in our success is greedy, selfish, entitled, and demonstrates the weakness of self doubt.

True leaders want to recognize everyone who contribute and do it in a fair and consistent way.DFL

This gesture in basketball is linear it acknowledges the last pass that lead to scoring while in business it isn’t as easy and we have to be mindful confident and fair enough to take the time to acknowledge other contributors.

The absence of acknowledgement is neglect and to neglect someone is a slight – it is disrespectful and leads away from a good relationship, not toward it.

I want those in my charge to feel fairly rewarded with acknowledgement and I want each one of them to be aggressively recognizing those who made a considerable contribution above, below, and across their station.

This is all based on honesty, fairness, and mindfulness realizing that acknowledgements, compliments, and recognition are earned they are not just given away. If they aren’t earned or truly challenging enough to warrant they will have no meaning or impact to motivate future great work, thought, or action.

I do believe in praising that which deserves to be praised. Dean Smith

If I have seen further than others, it is by standing upon the shoulders of giants. Isaac Newton

Take your yourself and those in your sphere of influence further by being generous and positive and freely communicating it and showing it. Take the risk and be brave enough to so you care.

I worry that business leaders are more interested in material gain than they are in having the patience to build up a strong organization, and a strong organization starts with caring for their people. John Wooden

Thank you

DrFrankLayman

How To Improve Performance: Innovating A Highly Skilled Team By DrFrankLayman

How To Improve Performance: Innovating A Highly Skilled Team
By DrFrankLayman

Value the team and their work. Have a sincere appreciation and express it openly.

Corporate culture matters, so ensure you are creating it. You should model it and purvey it. It should be facilitative, safe, and innovative. It should be a culture of leaders. How leadership chooses to value its people impacts effectiveness and innovation. DFL
When you do this is shows you believe in them and that is very powerful to innovation and performance.

My father gave me the greatest gift anyone could give another person, he believed in me. Jim Valvano

Don’t micromanage rather facilitate, support, and promote. Micromanagement and monotony stifle creativity and happiness in teams which are keys to results and productivity.

Don’t stifle creativity with control, have self realizing stops and thoughtful oversight.

Provide resources to build and encourage cooperation over competition. Long term happiness studies show this is a far better longevity approach.

Don’t neglect training even if it isn’t directly to support innovation, being trained in other areas there is a transposition that can lead to more creativity performance and personal satisfaction. Find innovative speakers and lecturers to expose yourself and team to.

Promote wellness
Be physically active as a group and promote team building activities.
True Health & Wellness cannot be separated into mental and physical, it is bound one part reliant on the other to be whole. DFL

Insert healthy humor into the environment, healthy humor is not aggressive humor – sarcasm, teasing,critical or ridicule. To be effective it should be self enhancing or affiliative.

Teach and encourage mindfulness.
Live your life each day as you would climb a mountain. An occasional glance towards the summit keeps the goal in mind, but many beautiful scenes are to be observed from each new vintage point. Harold B Melchart

Provide them resources to build their self efficacy, leadership, business acumen, and happines.

Make the environment safe by being honest and transparent allowing them that opportunity. Avoiding deceit and excuses allows trust to build and more trustworthy environments tend to be more creative.

Reward thoughtful courage
More often in life, we end up regretting the chances in life that we had, but didn’t take them, than those chances that we took and wished we hadn’t. Anonymous

Don’t set an environment where excuses are needed as a coping mechanism. That said, once your environment is set properly don’t let the team tolerate excuses.

An excuse is worse and more terrible than a lie, for an excuse is a
lie guarded. Pope John Paul I
Build their resilience. Don’t wish it were easier, wish you were better. Don’t wish for fewer problems, wish for more skills. Don’t wish for less challenges, wish for more wisdom. Earl Shoaf

Set goals but be flexible to see the opportunities that come from attempts that miss.
The tragedy of life doesn’t lie in not reaching your goal. The tragedy lies in having no goals to reach. Benjamin Mays

Be generous, generous people are confident they know they can achieve more and that they are above recognition the gratification isn’t needed.

Develop and encourage character building and professionalism

Look for opportunities to emphasize inclusivity.
A great person like a great river does not refuse even the smallest contributory. DFL

Don’t exert control exemplify positive influence.

Set time aside for oblique thinking activities strategic planning and creative positive personal interactions. Team building activity and esprit de corps.

Once the culture of leadership and creativity is formed allow it to reinvent itself always encouraging results and performance.
Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life’s about creating yourself. George Bernard Shaw

Promote, instill, teach and develop leadership.

The Eight Pillars of Leadership model

Trustworthy: Encourage honesty and sincerity in all and demand it in yourself.

Selfless: True leadership has and always will be set on the principal of selflessness.

Relational: Critical thinking should be fostered and developed to allow predominance and avoidance of ETTS.

Inspirational & Motivational:Cultivate a team mindset for excellence and innovation. Be enthusiastic and optimistic. Encourage thoughtful risk-taking. Create the environment and set the stage of enthusiasm, encouragement trust and performance. Prompt positive thoughts behaviors and actions while demonstrating them.

Supportive: Protect your people from political minefields. Secure needed resources and facilitate creativity to extract performance . Give feedback, do not assign blame.

Mission Driven:Have a shared team mission and encourage and assist those in your charge to find their own.

Responsible: Take responsibility as a leader. Model ethical action. Strive for balance.

Efforts and courage are not enough without purpose and direction.
John F Kennedy

The purpose of life is to be happy by being useful, effective, and honorable – To have provided a legacy by making a difference to humanity. DFL

If you believe that what you do matters ultima.tely it does.

They are able who think they are able. Virgil

Lead those around you to develop themselves outside the team. Self reliance is a fundamental key to improving group dynamics and performance. Encourage individual and grow with daily self development ( see my blog, listen to my podcast and read my book for further insight)

Leadership is an action not a position. DFL

Creating a supportive, motivating, encouraging culture for people to live in, allows greater opportunity to thrive, perform, and succeed. Positive cultures foster positive people and positive results.

The decay of imagination is the death of creativity. DFL

Our problems are man-made, therefore they may be solved by man. And man can be as big as he wants. No problem of human destiny is beyond human beings. John F. Kennedy

Thank you
DrFrankLayman
Author of: Contemplative Growth and Development; Daily Reflective Growth;
Reflections To Success; Success Through Logical Thinking

Transition Embraced: Searching For Opportunitiy In Challenge by DrFrankLayman

Transition Embraced: Searching For Opportunitiy In Challenge by DrFrankLayman

Transition feared is abysmal
Transition anticipated is infinite
DFL

Given the proper mentor and perspective transition is an opportunity for growth, achievement and success DFL

I chose to define Transition in terms of development evolution passage progress
Metamorphosis transformation.

Many fear it because transition Is difficult – growth always is.

Recently I Lectured on Positive Transition To Military personnel transitioning to the Civilian Workforce
I challenged them to think differently about the U know they face ahead of them
To see transition as a challenge and acknowledge that Challenges to allow for growth and opportunity
To go out with enthusiasm a plan and an adaptable mindset.
Not to just accept the conventional transition of getting a job but to consider transforming into and entrepreneur.
Not to accept the conventional definition of an entrepreneur but to consider my definition

Entrepreneur
One who finds a way to get compensated for their passion and happiness.

Then consider a team behind their endeavor, one that has the experience and tools to increase the probability of success.

I hated every minute of training, but I said, ‘Don’t quit. Suffer now and live the rest of your life as a champion.’ Muhammad Ali

We have to be realistic and understand transition takes time but I have the benefit of having gone through some tuff transitions and I have discovered

Small steps in my journeys have lead me to extraordinary places. DFL

Remember you have to include yourself, don’t wilt or retreat during this process

If you see the world as them and me you’ll always be excluded if you see it as us you’ll always be included DFl

That said we must dream and work.

Your not who you were which allows you to be something more DFL

My humanity is incessant self overcoming. Friedrich Nietzsche

No matter the transition you face now or in your future prepare yourself daily because they are coming and they don’t stop it’s like standing at the shore and meeting the waves you have to be ready to face the relentless surf with mindful intent and you will either struggle against it or learn to play in it – that is a choice

Don’t let your ego isolate you from the people and organizations that can help you. Out of pride we sometimes make the wrong decision not to seek help.
I want you to be self reliant but also capable of networking and reaching out to others. It is a complex tight rope to walk but becoming skill can make the difference of falling or moving forward.

Finally don’t let anyone pigeon hole you look at the opportunities and be confident your skills can be transposed.
Don’t let the critics dictate your dreams.
Many dreams are symbolic and at the same time real because reality is shaped by belief and perception DFL

Thank you
DrFrankLayman
Author of: Contemplative Growth and Development; Daily Reflective Growth;
Reflections To Success; Success Through Logical Thinking

Courage Counts: Advancing Through The Triumph Of Trying. By Dr.FrankLayman

Courage Counts: Advancing Through The Triumph Of Trying. By Dr.FrankLayman

I believe we are all leaders, we may not all hold leadership positions but we all have the capability to learn and be better leaders. Leadership is the action of leading a group of people.

Leadership is an action not a position. DFL

Anyone who poses good leadership will tell you courage is an intimate component. Courage is the ability to do something that frightens one: the strength in the face of difficulty.

Courage is what causes us to push on through the comfort of being still. DFL
Courage is important because it allows people to grow outside their comfort zone. Growth and development are a contribution of doing things that challenge you.
If you want to grow as a person you have to travel outside your comfort zone. DFL

Whether it is speaking to a group, presenting to peers, asking for something, offering something, selling something, negotiating, build something we have to have the courage to try.

To expand you universe you must develop the courage to try. DFL

Leadership by its very nature requires action, action requires courage. Fear is the most pervasive barrier for action, especially where groups are concerned. Getting before a group it is human nature you will be critiqued, you may be ignored or not accepted. To insulate yourself in self confidence and no longer adhere to the slings and arrows of those who are base in understanding and low in cognitive maturity takes courage.
“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.” Theodore Roosevelt
I am a firm believer in daily self development and actively recommend leadership develop be incorporated into your routine. There is a compelling case to invest in this part of your growth. There are many benefits you can gain form adding one of the most beneficial attributes to your dedicated self development routine.

One person with the courage to act, becomes a catalyst for motivating others. DFL

Courage is regarded as an admirable personal trait, providing benefits for others, personally, socially and professionally. Courage is one of the most valued and admired traits among business leaders and is sought in those slated for promotion or progression. Not being in an organization but being an autonomous entrepreneur takes an even higher level of leadership and courage. Courage enhances leadership by improving the experiences you can have.
Understanding and experience lead to confidence and confidence provides the benefit of acting over over analyzing (paralysis by analysis).

Most will never discover that the final dynamic of achieving is the courage to act. DFL

The courage to step outside myself has lead me to grow and develop. DFL
You advance through the triumph of trying. DFL

I hope your daily self development is going well and that you are seeing results. I offer my services to anyone who wants the opportunity to advance further and faster.

Dr.FrankLayman
Author Success Through Logical Thinking
#STLTmindset

 

Diplomacy: 8 Keys To Realize Positive Influence by Dr.FrankLayman

Diplomacy: 8 Keys To Realize Positive Influence
To be diplomatic means to positively influence by evaluating a situation before jumping to a conclusion, speaking or acting. By doing so we improve our probability of taking the best possible course of action without being brash, bold and/or condescending. It requires sound critical thinking and judgment, grace, poise, subtlety, and knowing how and what to say to be diplomatic. It requires sincerity and cognitive maturity. While diplomacy can be difficult in certain situations, especially in those that are emotionally charged, there are a few things to remember that can make it easier.

1. Slow down the tempo, breath, relax, focus and think
There is so much chaos in some situations we can get blinded by it. We can’t let that ourselves be negatively influenced, we have to control our mind. We need to learn to relax, calm down, take a deep breath and try to see how we can make things work rather than letting the momentum of negative emotions overwhelm us. DFL

2. Review the facts and check them
The facts will speak for themselves. Ralph Chaplin

3. Plan what you are going to say and how you are going to say it as to influence the outcome positively
Well conceived thoughts spoken responsibly can create cooperation and avoid discord. DFL

4. Adopt a none confrontational tone, demeanor and posture
Your body language and facial expression speak before you and at times in contradiction of you. DFL

5. Don’t get side tracked or baited
He who angers you conquers you. Elizabeth Kenny

6. Return to the facts
Seek truth from objective fact finding to come to a fair assessment. DFL
7. Stay calm and confident
Keep your mind clear yet alert, remain calm and confident and always in command of yourself. By doing so, you will then find greater effectiveness in your diplomacy.

We are not defined merely by what we do, but what we constrain ourselves from doing. – Dr Frank Layman

8. Keep in mind the value of the relationship and what is at stake but not in a way to deter your convictions but to monitor your impact.
By focusing on all that is important we retain what is of value while influencing a purge of what is caustic. DFL

I see it all the time, the poorer the diplomacy employed by leaders and team members the less effective and the more disruptive the culture. If more leaders where more contentious about being diplomatic they would be more successful in not only the retention of talent but the advancement of peak performance in them.
Everyone no matter the environment or position they hold should strive to be diplomatic.
Diplomacy is not waffling but influencing from a position of rational thoughts and behavior.
I speak from a perspective based off my book http://t.co/25RN1Xx7qh www.FrankLaymanstlt.com , entrepreneur experiences, administrative position and Military service. I often say if we accept that we are all leaders then being more effective as a leader can realize a positive impact in any setting we cohabit-work,school,home,church,etc… Diplomacy can help our effectiveness in any environment or situation.

The purer your Leadership is of sincerity transparency and truth the purer it will be received and responded to. DrFrankLayman

The purer your Leadership is of sincerity transparency and truth the purer it will be received and responded to. DrFrankLayman

Use not diplomacy to get your way for by the very definition we have set here, it is to influence the path of truth with the least amount of harm and the greatest amount of positive impact.

I encourage all to continue your daily self development. There are not limits on your growth, your effectiveness, and your success – unless you stop working to improve them.
See also my other blogs and book. Keep a watch for other writings coming soon and should you not want to wait consider contacting me about setting up unique and individualized speaking engagement.

Dr.FrankLayman

The Mentality of Mediocrity

The Mentality of Mediocrity

A good friend of mine (who it happens is a reserve buddy) has struggled through some difficult times recently. He is an exceptional person that many today will never get a chance at knowing. There is a bias we hold onto concerning our veterans. I have been in service long enough and I have seen it all. The times during the previous administrations where we were acknowledge but for the most part ignored; to the post 911 period where we were sought after and revered; to the more recent times were we are being diminished and excluded in many arenas. My friend has struggled following his service with a broken home, poor job opportunities, and the mental stress that goes with being marginalized.
We have engaged in many conversations and while I have desired to help him the truth is he is always a help to me. His young life has seen many disappointments but he has not stopped trying hoping and working hard. I am glad to know him honored to call him friend and brother and sad that many will miss out on him because of how many presently view our veterans; many ceasing to see the person for the struggles. Since I am here for my brothers in arms he and I have talked many times and communicated back and forth during many of his frustrations and struggles over the past year. He is doing much better his life is stabilizing he is growing and adapting to the situation he is in and was recently accepted into a hard to get admitted to professional program.
To thank me he collected a grouping of communications I had sent to him over the last year and he sent them to me. My gift, and I cannot emphasize how great a gift, was my own words the ones that helped to motivate him, helped to heal and build him up. The following are my words to him arranged by him in a way that impacted him so positively and I hope you can gain from.

The mentality of mediocrity and settling for circumstances instead of stepping up and stepping out is detrimental to the development of life.
Striving to preserver and push through is the first step to success. A positive attitude to negative circumstances and driving forward unceasingly is the second step. Hard work and dedication are also required elements and are the third step.
Remember always forward, never relenting this should be the attitude of everyone who desires success. Being grateful while also being driven to improve. Staying motivated and never accepting a starting circumstance that resulted from birth, sacrifice, genetics, upbringing as a life sentence. These are states of being and can be changed by our deliberate thinking and motivation. Create a goal, get help when needed, follow through, take each task to its completion, never accept the first no, and push to the finish (Success Through Logical Thinking). Once you arrive at success don’t rest it is like being rescued from a disaster once safe regroup and find ways to help others out.

After these words he wrote, “Thank you MAJ Layman you are a very wise man and counselor.”

While I did not understand my impact at the time all I wanted to do was motivate a friend. The truth as you can see, is by reaching out to help, as is often the case, the true blessing was bestowed back on me. How touching and powerful, I would encourage you – don’t wait reach out with the intent to be an inspiration the result may surprise you and enhance your life more than you can realize.

Dr Frank Layman

The Rational Development to a Successful Well Adjusted Life

The Six Adult Life Tasks
Identity by Erikson

Erik Erikson Identity: a sense of one’s own self are one’s own and not one’s parents or peers. Prior to entering the adult world adolescent achieve a sense of identity. Once achieved they can progress to young adults and move on to the next stage of life, Intimacy, and forge close reciprocal emotional bonds.

Intimacy
Expanding one’s sense of self to include another person.

Career Consolidation
Expanding one’s personal identity to assume a social identity within the world of work.

Generativity
Mastery of the task involves the demonstration of a clear capacity to unselfishly guide the next generation.

Keeper of the Meaning
Mastery of this fifth task is development of intellect and experience by the role of the sage

Integrity
Erikson described Integrity as “an experience which conveys some world order and spiritual sense. No matter how dearly paid for, it is the acceptance of one’s one and only life cycle as something that had to be and that, by necessity, permitted of no substitutions.”

Simply and rationally stated:
Know yourself=>Give yourself to another=>Define yourself by striving toward expertise in your chosen occupation =>Take on the leadership role of mentor=>Continue developing yourself and sharing your wisdom.

Each phase requires time and care be used to logically evaluate the authenticity of a decision for emotions, which can distort truth and lead us astray from success? Fore, the small decisions and choices made add up to be the product of our lives.
Our lives are a progressive advancement from what we learn and experience in each phase of life. To avoid stalling in a phase we must strive for continued growth. Success in life follows a self direct path, if you don’t want to stand still or fall back you have to deliberately and unceasingly move forward. This is true in our life long maturing in happiness, love, career…
It is not by happenstance that we develop into well adjusted adults and follow a happy successful path, rather it is achieved by deliberate intention.
Dr. Frank Layman

The Ds of Success

Would you want your house built without blueprints? Would you want to lead a meeting without an agenda? How about travel to an unknown destination without directions? Here is a glimpse of a recommended outline for success. When I approach my recommendations I do not do it lightly. I want for my readers to achieve success in all areas of their lives. My intentions are sincere and my hope authentic. Start with Ds of Success:

Decide

First and foremost we need to decide in what area we want to succeed in. You have to first decide what your success is going to look like. A planned trip is not successful unless you reach your destination. Once you have decided on the areas you want to be successful in the next step is planning. Planning requires research our efforts in this area can always be more focused – which can improve the probability of success.

Define

Define the goals that make up your area of success – sharpen you pencil be precise. Work backwards from the finish line so you can outline all the steps required to go from where you are to where you want to be.

Determine

Determine the best approach to reaching your goal. The more direct the better. Time is a limited resource so the quickest route between two points is a straight line. I enjoy flying for its directness. When I engage a goal, I look to the most direct route to achieve it. I do my homework, I check with others who have achieved it and I objectively look for the quickest route.

Determination

Once you have determined what success means; defined the goals that truly capture what success is for you – do not waver in your pursuit. Engage, be mindful and build your determination.

Durability

Success for some is a sprint. Rational thinkers are not jealous so that is great for some, however, for most success is a marathon. In our pursuit of success we must be durable. We need to know how to be durable, depending on the goal that is going to look different but from experience I will say most share health and wellness.

Due Diligence

Be a life long learner continually striving to improve. Keep drilling down until you have your answers, develop your approach, and reach your destination. Please consider using STLT Success Through Logical Thinking as part of your due diligence.

You can order from this web site or at Barnes and Noble; Amazon; and Kindle.

Dr. Frank Layman